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Poem

It’s a messed up world out there, we all got trauma 
Real question is, do you avoid the drama?
When someone tells you secrets, do you blab em to the world?
Or keep ‘em locked up like you should?

I keep yours and I keep mine deep down
They build up over time, I’m gonna drown
Up to my ears in this mess that I can’t change 
Deep in the waters of the bad days 

I hate going through stuff alone, but that’s the way it goes
The days are bright and the nights are cold
Fall is coming but I fell long ago
Even the high temps leave me low

But I cover up and wear a mask
Pushing the real me further back
Forget who I really am, short term memory
Cuz I lost the good ones from the last century 
I reach out to my friends so our relationship doesn’t end
Then if I stop them texts, I’ll never hear anything  

Do what I can to keep myself sane
But still have these thoughts every day
Doc said that and Doc said this
Asked me what’s good and what’s amiss

We pay you good to do your job
Why can’t you tell me what’s going on?
Nobody knows, there’s no diagnosis 
I’d rather be told I have scoliosis
Cuz this pain is a constant, sometimes worse 
Never better, always hurts 

Smile like it’s good, drive through the hood
To my one day a week job, it’s not very good
Losing my sanity quicker than I’m getting money
You can’t tell if I’m joking, cuz it all sounds funny
Welcome to my life, it’s kinda strange

But I cover up and wear a mask
Pushing the real me further back
Forget who I really am, short term memory
Cuz I lost the good ones from the last century 
I reach out to my friends so our relationship doesn’t end
Then if I stop them texts, I’ll never hear anything

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