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Not a man among us could believe the tales as told
A forty foot gorilla must be fable
This jungle is so hot by day but in the night so cold
It had been said our minds were quite unstable
For acting on the rumours when we’re not completely sold
Suggest we all deserve that ‘nutter’ label
But every man among us would do anything for gold
And so we’ll get that beast if we are able

                              *

Bananas in this jungle two feet long from tip to tip
Maybe causing growth at faster rates
And thus creating quite an evolutionary blip
with massive figs and quite enormous dates
So if we get the monster and the media let’s rip
We’ll all be heroes back home in the states
But will a forty foot gorilla sink our ageing ship
And leave us clinging on to wooden crates

                              *

We found that ape and drugged him but he started to recover
He screamed so loud but he was tied down well
He grinned at me as though he knew that soon we would discover
Something that might send us all to hell
The men stepped back and did their best to hide behind each other
And one man stammered through his urgent yell
“You’ve got your huge gorilla, but turn round and meet it’s mother!”
…
It wasn’t she that made the awful smell.

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