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Twas the semi final Coming to its end, Three all male finalists Bucking previous trend. When told she was leaving She'd stoically played her part. Deep down she was seething With murder in her heart. One great yell of Banzai One contestant dead Felled by a heavy frying pan Smacked across the head. The first one down and, With, her anger still unsated She hid inside the grounds And patiently waited, Vowed to herself She wouldn't budge Until she'd killed At least one judge. The bearded bloke Him for a start. He'd been sarky about Her Bakewell Tart. Had a soggy bottom The bastard had said. Well he didn't laugh then As she stabbed him dead. The very thought Making her merry, She planned the demise Of judge Mary Berry. She laughed so much At her planned joke She went and had A fatal stroke. They covered the deaths With a bunch of lies And continued on To present the prize. For it's the baking that matters And the tension is so thrilling And it's not so very often, After all, it ends up in a killing Oh it's full of verve and passion, You can sense the tempers rise As they all scheme and vie for That British Bake Off First prize.
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