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The figurative nail hit on the hirsute covered head! Eventually vices will witness me crow king cough'n affliction caw hearse courtesy smok'n since me yay high, hence appellation (mountain) wheezer natural set of adult teeth (rotten to the core) easily plucked out courtesy tweezer, this har nonestablishmentarian, never prevaricator nor crowd pleaser, whose barreled chest attests quantity maximum grog, which equals capacity of keezer, or analogous to quaffing amount stout beer downed by yours truly (rough estimation by dickens) equivalent to hinted wealth of Ebenezer Scrooge, who could hypothetically purchase abundant amount of ale. Above fabrication nonsense yay figurative hook to grab attention my way ain't one applicable factual word written, cuz I take poetic license with no intended off fence touché harmless figurative foil as usual trademark innocent word play geezer who sports brown golden locks employs good humor as keyway to unlock mine mindscape entranceway. After posting poem comb what may, drink'n like vichyssoise floundering fiend, I reluctantly brush aside male pattern baldness without dismay, cuz patrilineal genetic trait shows no happy shiny pate rather paternal ancestry somewhat thick with strands turning sixty plus shades of gray. The following recounts true account one hundred purse cent actual bonafide certifiable event attested to courtesy one germane gent badinage represents laughable intent as he deeply inhales cigarette brand Kent. Though no physician, this aging baby boomer former long haired pencil necked geek absolutely, intuitively, erroneously, and unequivocally sensed hair loss (mine), at first a speculative rumor not simply rooted in my (ahem) head, no matter a minimalist groomer nevertheless, thinning follicles, upon dawning realization, sans medical sought relief thru good humor, though within this balding cerebral noggin became repulsive as if my scalp pulled pate rendered as a tumor. Thus an unexpectedly present surprise when in private consultation in the guise as out patient client (early afternoon December 19th, 2018), where I did fraternize and kibitz with the medical assistant (old enough to be my...sister), aye did exercise mild mannered mien mean, aye do patronize before doctor Rudolf (dearly reigned) Roth, a practicing Dermatologist told me no lies his instant karma knowledge - mainly his thirty seven years expertise sought to excise a prominent non cancerous mole approximately centered middle of back a small patch of skin, he needed to anesthetize nonetheless, a reassuring persona, yours truly did lionize (not merely, cuz he received a five star rating, specialist under auspices of Penn, Medicine) in Radnor Pennsylvania), his modest calm did neutralize any uneasiness, as did his pronounced humility earn kudos to idolize such rarely present gentility, and unwitting capacity did harmonize, and maximize significance to me, asper my thinning limp hair logically rationalize identified underactive thyroid gland (hypothyroidism) tubby, which didst legitimize no hair brained rooted concern, hence...less reason to catastrophize', which for no reason I wanted to mildly emphasize, hence choice to apostrophize...
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