Email Poem

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Poem

I know what I did was wrong
I could have handled it better
But God, please oh please
Don't think any less of me
I know you are my teacher
And I know that this shouldn't matter so much
But for some reason I can't help it
What you think of me really matters
I can't go around pretending that I don't care
If you disapprove of me
Then I'll just have to find a way to prove myself
That lecture you gave us
Well I didn't think much of it in the beginning but
When you said that you expected more of me
I felt horrible, like my shield of pride
Had been cut down, and thrown to the side
Leaving me without protection
Feeling down on myself, and alone
I shouldn't have done that I know
And I know your lecture was supposed to make me feel guilty
But you don't know how much I look up to you
How I want to be just like you when I'm older
But now you disapprove 
And I still haven't thought of what I'm going to say tomorrow
What will happen
Will you take one look at me your eyes boring with pity
And turn away
Will you act as if it didn't happen...
No, I know you better then that
I know for the next few weeks I will feel ashamed of myself
I know that you will silently and painfully hold it over me
Even though everyone else has let it go
You just don't get how much I need to impress you
Without your encouragement and words of wisdom
I feel a little lost in the world
And I can't ask anyone for help
Because you were the one I would turn to
My world is upside down
And you my light at the end of the tunnel
Has silently gone out
And I'm walking... blindfolded...

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