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There were days when I looked back And could only see… pain, desperation, darkness Following me from the ancient feelings The past where I was no longer present A place of pain, abuse, so destructive There were those days when I couldn’t see Any way around the past, my history Prevented me from accepting the joy, the freedom Light that shimmered and glowed all around me Solace, warmth, promises of acceptance There were moments when I looked back To silent dreams who were nearly dead Still shadows of a dark and lonely saga Dread that filled me with melancholy, so sad Wisps of stardust falling all around me Reminding me that I would forever be Caught in the hush of this painful mystery The cruelty of blame, unforgiveness Bitterness, sour as biting lemons Swelled my thoughts with memories Panic attacks and anxiety, Anti-depressants and shadows of hatred Feeding the darkness that colored my spirit In a bleak, black veil of anger and resentment Then the hint of absolution Thrust its knife into my spirit Slicing away the dead layers of shame The guilt and anguish and breathless ache Feelings so dark and dreadful, dooming My soul to feel only the disdain, destroying All the good things, the joy and compassion The wonder of a life filled with enchantment His grace fell across my thoughts Resonating words of liberty, pardon From this prison of dread and fear, this cage Filled with penetrating pain and insecurity His hands were scarred by nails that had pierced them Leaving me the chance to know the meaning Of the word “forgiveness” and “freedom” With His grace to remind me of my forgiveness I realized that I could no longer hold onto the grudge The bitterness, the loathing, that brought so much scorn Contempt that silenced all the music of the heart Disdain that felt like it was piercing holes through my thoughts Ridicule that reminded me I was so very sinful, so wrong Finally, I found the answer to this unforgiveness that I felt I reached inside and allowed Jesus to guide me toward a heart Felt promise of compassion and understanding, mercy That reminded me how very merciful He had been When He saved me from this darkness, this sin – bringing me Peace that restores and repairs – Peace that is alive Dancing through the heart, soul and mind… a waltz Reaching out to the heavens, toward eternity, forever With the king of Kings – the Prince of peace, my everything! With Him, there is clemency, mercy, absolution Assurance that Grace will color the whole life In a kindness that destroys the darkest pride! Forgiveness Poetry Contest Sponsored by: Anoucheka Gangabissoon June 26, 2022
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