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Mr. Prim provoked shame, guilt, and fear In every heart, mind, and soul of Redding Pointing his long, boney finger at whoever was near Screaming out sinner, to hell you are heading! Mr. Prim went to church three times a day Prayed morning, noon, and night Walked the straight and narrow, never to stray He would shun wrong and always do right A new movie in town, a huge sensation Was rated PDV (perverse, disgusting, and vile) Mr. Prim had to crush this abomination Not one soul would this filth defile! But the neon marquee announced: A Tribute To Mr. Prim Tonight, we praise our saint’s glory Let all our townsfolk welcome him As we tell his inspiring story The MC, Mayor Jones, smiled and took the stage Mr. Prim began to feel frightened somehow Introduced as Redding’s godly sage Then asked to stand and take a bow A year ago, at the passing of Joan, his wife Proclaimed Mayor Jones demurely She left us an account of Mr. Prim’s life Which was not led all that purely Now, as we view his spicy story With our neighbor’s life honestly shown Please keep in mind, as we praise God’s glory Beware if you cast the first stone The lights dimmed as the show began Mr. Prim shook, sweated and fled the hall The audience laughed, every woman and man For there was never a movie at all!
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