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Triggered by tiredness and strain
Upon my wearisome, impaired brain
My guard is down the strange drain
Refrain from driving me insane

Within me is the pain of betrayal
So impulsive was my actions a while ago
Within me is the insane feelings that fail
To gladden my Lord…the Lord of joy aglow

Remembrance of wickedness
Has been saved by my afflictions and then…my repentance within
Deliverance due to righteousness
Has been keeping me safe from harm and hurt…slaying me with love again

I gain a soreness inside my soul
I am but a grain of salt, losing its taste
My brain is far gone as a whole
I love the angsty feelings of grace at haste

Keep pace with my bitter heartbeats
Greet me with open arms…with sunlit smiles…
Difficulties arise as happiness repeats
Meet me as I take a seat here, hit with trials…

So many trials has perceived my eyesight and mindset
It has filled me with upset and so much unneeded regret
Worship God in all His wonderfulness, even if your heart moans in misery
Bring me to life with Your cheer every year that I fear negativity will put out glee

Know that I still want you to be free this time
Just let go of doubt and hope away your fears
Glow like the sun will during this summertime
Just let go of the wintry frost of hatred and tears

Humbly heal and belong in God’s right hand
Understand that you’re stronger than you realize
Our faith is as numerous as the beach sand
Broken spirits will rise from the ashes before our eyes

Change is a challenging chore, yes, as the saying goes since I was a young boy
I colored my hair turquoise for the sake of weird self-expression and childlike joy
I’m clever and creative and God wants me to go so far with it
He doesn’t mind me falling a little low to help others in need, but He wants me to rise from where I sit

All of our thought process
Should give us some progress
Relieve me from all distress
Replace it with pure happiness

For, I have been impulsive
I’ll let go and let live…give…
Give me a reason to live…
Lord, You’re the reason I live and receive a life to relive

Pray the devil won’t prey upon me again
As I impulsively live life…hopefully I truly know where I’ll go in the long run…
Then again, as I live my life, I count to ten
Where have you been all my life? What have I done to hurt you? I just wanted to have fun…

You made fun of me
Because I lived life impulsively
Now, I’m stronger than you…
You who bullied me with rue
You made fun of me
Made a fool out of me honestly
Anyhow, I’ll tell you true
The reason I do these horrible things to myself is because of you

Sorry to blame you though
I impulsively wish otherwise
My feelings flow to and fro
I pray daily for my demise
Sorry, God of grace, 
I let you down in this race
Trace my disgrace no more
My face is sopping with sweat and regret…as you soar evermore

I wish I could soar with you in spirit
I regret sinning against You heartlessly
Anguish fell upon me as I truly saw fit
My eyes are wet with remorse hoarsely

Mourning for your Voice of Rejoice
To drown away my impulsive difficulties
Peace in and of mind is my choice
To embrace and accept during my hardships at ease

Please understand what I’m saying
I’m praying that I get better in time
The Havasu breeze blows on, swaying
Into my heart, home-bound in its prime

Conquer me with adoration to the core
My quest is to be in this journey with You
On my mind, heart, and all of me, even if change is a challenging chore forevermore
I’ll try my best to be…no longer be impulsive in what I do

Impulsively loving the negativity won’t do
I’m impaired and oh so embarrassed
Repeatedly praying…forgiving myself too
Mentally and emotionally harassed
By others because I love You
Actions say it’s not true…that, I say is true…words without action strays
I haven’t a clue what to do
It bothers me to say this — you’re lost in your wandering ways these days

Who knew
I’d be lost without You
Sorry I was impulsive all my life it seems
I can mend with Your help and Your spirit beams
Within me and out of me
Without you, I’m not free

Triggered by trials that drip on like rain
Upon my wearisome, broken-down brain
Figured out that I’ve been impulsively high
For so long, my guard has been low, can’t deny

If I was lying,
You’d know
If I was dying,
It would show
If I was trying,
I’d reap what I sow
If I was crying,
You’d shed sunlight aglow
Let Your faith grow
Let distress go
You know what I mean
Let happiness intervene
What’s seen is left unseen
For those who are impulsively obscene

In my teens and beyond, 
I can’t deny this to my dismay
I was impulsive as a wild, broken wand…
I vow this too — you will be okay

Under your spell of impulsive sway 
But, remember, we’ll be okay, okay?
I’m drunk with depression and angry with anxiety
Just know that joy will come if you let God in freely
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