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The car was checked out for I would have a hard day Off to Alameda an investigation crossing over the bay The car came to a halt in the middle of the bridge I pull over and got on the passenger side That’s all I remember until weeks passed I pondered and wondered and asked and asked But my brain was swollen so I had no memory And did not hold the memories when people told them People came to visit but I do not remember who Friends co-workers, an EMT too I was friendly and polite so I have been told A gift again for I think people left seeing me in stitches and casts Only pain and broken bones returned night after night A year of PT and speech therapy Slowly returned the most important memories Except for that day when death came so near The policemen had already given up on me Waiting for the final words of the EMT But he opened the crushed door and whispered to me So I woke up and smiled all ready to go But he grabbed me and told me no no They raised me so carefully and put me in a gurney And off to the hospital with nights of surgery Still no memory a gift perhaps Years later with rehab and doctors galore Taking some pills and being told over again and again It was a miracle which I found was hard to accept For its been hard to find words and it is painful to move Though one night when I was alone with my dog Billy The pain was erupting and I was afraid My X-husband was away and counting on a large Amount from the truck that crushed me and my car He hoped for the money and but had no heart I felt a presence as the dog quieted down He lay by my bed I know he felt it too And a warmth surrounded and enfolded me A Love was there then it quickly went away What that was I only know that I hold onto it to this day Yes yes now I do quietly pray For it kept me going and it gave me rest Yet I never forget the fear and loneliness And that moment of a deep togetherness It was a gift given in an moment of infinite tenderness Thus I try to return that warmth the the best way I can
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