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Friendship in a Covid world. (C) Arthur Abrahamson January 2021 My Facebook friends photo stares back at me from the blue tinted screen A 13 -year-old photograph, the hint of a smile, looking cool looking mean What do you look like now I wonder, older?wiser? angrier? calmer? Prematurely aged perhaps by life’s little dramas. “You can choose your friends but not your relations” an often repeated mantra from my father who was as right as he was contrary. Our real friendships oil the wheels of our lives with friends, lovers, husbands and wives, they age with us and care about us as they would a sister or brother, we are their cherished sibling unattached by blood. My Facebook friends are regimented on my screen like dissolute soldiers in various stages of readiness about to march onto some unknown battleground far away in the ether. They have funny names Krafty Q,,Lucy Luck, Donald mouse and Mickey duck, Send me a PM they say but I’m not Whats apping today, I won’t get back to you right away. Face-to-face in real time I can see the glint in my friends eye, a sudden smile chased from their face as the conversation moves on again, Real friends can see my gain, my loss, my joy, my hurt my pain They ring me at unexpected times, we chat, we sigh, we laugh and cry they’re familiar voices provide a source of comfort to me like an old favourite jumper I’ve worn for years. We chat about the highs and lows of our times together, telling each other cherished jokes and stories that are the markers in our coveted relationship. They are real, they are the people, although not always seen, who are there in spirit to turn to when I’m emotionally bereft, or lose a loved one to a Covid death, They, who I move towards when I need a cuddle when life at home becomes a muddle. A wall of silent photos on my computer screen I have 396 Facebook friends, I’ve only ever met 22 the rest are silent never ageing, still in particular poses I much prefer my real friends who I can see to embrace and hold when this horror closes.
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