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Father was strong, and there were only two emotions I remember.
One was the kind he portrayed when filled with anger. Secondly,
our father often laughed with his friends, but seldom with his family.
But that observation by me and my siblings would not hold forever.

It fell apart one evening when he came home after drinking, and
clearly, he was very 'high' and talking a lot. Our father invariably                                                                     
never drank alcohol except on weekends.  However, we also                                          
discovered that night that something had gone seriously wrong.

We all were taken by surprise as daddy came home, and not only
had he been drinking, but he began to cry in front of his entire family.
I can see him in the bed now. More than 59 years have passed, but I can   feel my present emotion responding to this story as I write.  I don't  remember how or why the reason for our father's crying was clear to us,    
but our father was visibly crying, and it proved to be his last sigh.

Four years prior, our father had a serious illness and was informed that
he should expect to live four more years.  Well, the four years occurred,
and daddy knew that his time was near, that life was about to end.  The                                                        
prior four years had been good ones. He returned to Christ and his life had                                                
changed from drinking and gambling on weekends to becoming a deacon                                                       
and going regularly to church.                                           

The doctor's accuracy was amazing.  The moment of truth had arrived,
and we all knew.  The knowledge of an impending death is one thing,
but accepting death is one giant challenge to the best of us.  We had 
never seen daddy cry, and this cry by no means revealed any weakness.

I sense that daddy was not afraid to die, but I think that years of loss
flashed before him, years that were now history.  Presently, he wanted
to make our lives better, but it was too late.  The crying was not about him, but us.

082621PSCtest, This Or That, Vol 6, Edward Ibeh
Title chosen, 'Last Sigh'. 4P
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