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The following limericks are a continuation of: https://www.poetrysoup.com/poem/wicked_marys_been_a_bad_girl_1381428 Mary was simply horrid, as a wee girl She was naughty and selfish, a school yard churl She picked on one lil kid Oh, yes indeed she did Took out her scissors and cut off the girl's curls One day she sat all alone on the playground With an itsy bitsy spider she had found Mary threw it in water Though she hadn't oughta Then chuckled when the tiny creature drowned Little Red Riding Hood loved her grandmother Mary murdered her, used a pillow to smother She killed the old lady Her heart's dark and shady Blamed it on the Big Bad Wolf, her soul brother Old King Cole was a very merry old soul Until he was tripped and fell into a hole Mary was the culprit Confessed on the pulpit Thrown in the dungeon. She's out on parole She had the impudence to goose Mother Goose For such bad behavior, there is no excuse Mary should be ashamed But she screamed, "I was framed!" I'm certain she has a few screws that are loose She's no longer allowed at McDonald's farm Was caught trying to do the animals harm Set the hen house on fire Then denied it, the liar The rooster's crowing raised the sound of alarm I'm sure you've heard the story of Jack and Jill Little ones who went for water on the hill Their bucket had a hole Made by Mary, the troll She said being malicious gives her a thrill Mary ate Hansel and Gretel's breadcrumb trail She was the mean witch who caged them in a jail To sell them for a price Their lives she'd sacrifice Mary's an ornery cuss; a peeved female She once visited the home of The Three Bears Tasted all their porridge and then went upstairs She broke the baby's bed When she had sex with Fred Oh, the stories I could tell about her affairs!!! She loved hassling and teasing Little Boy Blue Tied him under the haystack, that nasty shrew The boy was found near death Gasping for one more breath When he was rescued, Mary cried out, "Oh, POOH!" Mary is jealous of those who are witty She's rather surly, and not very pretty Thinks her beliefs are right Careful or she'll backbite Read about it in a poetic ditty Mary, Mary, quite contrary, you'll go to hell Burying pretty maids amid your cockleshells It's a crime and a sin Now, it's done you in It happens when against the truth one rebels
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