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MY FREEDOM, MY SANITY

Spending ample time with my younger son and
youngest daughter brought memories; sweet,
delightful ones and sad, painful, troubled times.

Here I am catching myself pondering, looking back   
when they were teen agers, when I was caught in
the dark side of my life trying to HOLD on to my sanity.

Living with an alcoholic was difficult for there was
no stability, it was living a vicious cycle all the time.
I was in the point of losing my mind as it was against
my principle to enable this vice to be with my family.

The effects of alcoholism were like VINES, creeping in,
invading my house, my mind, clouding my dispositions.
I felt trapped, suffocated, could not fully INHALE the air
that I breathed; it was more like, I could only GASP for air.

And I could not GRASP the idea of continuing to live with
their father, although I wanted to keep the marriage.
I felt the CLASP holding us together was loosening for me.
I could not CLUTCH tightly anymore, I needed to let go.

I felt like a restless bird trapped in the cage that could
not fly and all I could think of was to be freed from the
situation I was in, free like a bird free to fly and SOAR.
Free from the darkness for all I could see was dark HUED.

Free to reestablish myself and have my sanity intact, 
free to be back to a colorful world and see the light.
Like being out in the park or beach watching kites
GLIDE in the sky and seeing bright colors with delight.


7/6/21             Writing Prompt - Grasp - Poetry
                       Constance La France

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