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Poem

I wish I could go back and tell past me,
I don’t always need to make others smile,
I’m not a mistake, I’m just not carefree
I’m human and allowed to cry for a while.

Pouring my emotions out in writing, 
Has always been a safe way for me,
To finally let down the guard I’m wearing,
And finally, let my facade fall free.

I let myself fall, cracked and broken,
Sobbing in the lonely solitude,
Drafting up stories I’ll leave unspoken,
Because if I speak up it’s deemed, “attitude”

I’m not as prissy perfect as I appear, 
In fact, it’s all one silly made-up illusion,
I thought if I tried, it would all disappear, 
But that’s a trick and I’m no magician.

We all play parts in our daily life,
But negativity shouldn’t be a weakness, 
If anything, make it worth the strife, 
Instead of hiding behind a mask in secret.

I’m slow to ask for help but I need it at heart,
But what would they say if they knew?
If they knew that my health has been torn apart,
But it’s only mental so they don’t have a clue.

We all have demons to fight, big or small,
Each one has already punctured or clawed,
So I feel guilty asking for help through it all
When we are all messed up and flawed.

How I choose to act, or what I choose to say,
It’s all a cover, a hidden plastic surface
But my inner voices remind me every day,
No matter the disguise, I’ll always be imperfect.

Written: June 23, 2021
Contest: “Flawed” 
Sponsor: Constance La France

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