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When I am drowning I want you to be the water crushing down on me, escaping my last breath. When I am shot I want you to be the stinging bullet the pierces my skin. You will be the blood flowing from the hole in my heart and you will be my heart pumping the blood out to my death. When I am sad you will be the feeling of warmth upon my cheeks and the salty taste on my lips from tears. When I am overjoyed you will be the stretch of skin across my face. You will be the twinkle in my overflowing eyes. You will be the memories pressing against my skull when my head aches. You will be the blade perfectly slicing my skin. You will be my anger releasing vulgar words and you will be my pointing finger. You will be the reddening of my face and the burning of my pride. When I am fed up I want you to be my rage that puts a hole in the wall. When I am heartbroken you will be the glass shattered on the floor. When I am choking your hands will be the ones around my neck. When I stand before myself in front of the mirror, you will be my reflection staring back at me. When my veins are bursting I want you to be the needle that punctures them. When I have given up on my survival, I want you to be the icy cold touch that consumes my body. When I have decided enough is enough I want you to be that little voice in the back of my head. When I let myself fall from the sky I want you to be the wind that carries me to the bottom. When I have fallen to my death you will be the blood stained carpet on which others will later stand. You will be the jealousy tearing away at my soul when I witness happiness. You will be my broken wings on which I try to fly away with. You will be reality destroying my every thought. You will be my emotions draining from the bottom. You will be everything that no one has ever wanted except me. When I am buried you will be the dirt holding me down. You will be the worms and bugs feasting on my body. You will be the forever coffin that surrounds my sleeping self. Written December 16, 2008
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