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I would like to tell you folks about the biggest deal I’ve ever had the chance to make and how it all went down. I owned a small antique shop, where I bought and sold old treasures, eking out a living on the seedy side of town. Must have been ‘round 10 a.m. when suddenly this woman took me by complete surprise. Some gal I didn’t know. She looked like she was made of money…diamonds everywhere, but I just played it cool, so my excitement wouldn’t show. “Yes, ma’am,” I said cautiously, and then…“how can I help you?” She said, “Your old piano’s nice…but I can’t find a price.” “I’ve only had the piece a week,” I guardedly explained. "I haven’t done my research…but you’re right, it’s very nice." “I agree,” she smiled and said, “and I would like to buy it. I'd pay you very handsomely…I think it's just divine.” Her anxious words were so unlike the type I tend to hear, I couldn’t help but wonder…was she feeding me a line? I became suspicious that this lady knew pianos. Perhaps it was a Steinway! I just wasn’t really sure. But I could tell that she was rich, and she was sounding desperate, so I just looked her in the eye and calmly said to her, “Just what were you thinking you would pay me for this jewel? I’m sure it’s very old… and you can see it’s clean and sound.” “I don’t care…just price it,” were her words. (I was astonished.) I quickly smelled a chance to make a ton on what I’d found. “I’m a little hesitant to sell it,” I surprised her, “‘cause this is not an ordinary instrument, you know. Old pianos have gone up…and this one’s extra shiny. Maybe you should simply tell me - how high you will go.” “Name your price,” she said with lots of confidence (and courage). “This one is a beauty…but they rarely bring a lot.” (I was now convinced that it was really something special.) I told her, “Come on, lady… go ahead ‘n’...take a shot.” “I will pay in cash, and give you twenty thousand dollars!” The offer was so huge I felt she had to be a pro. She’d stumbled on to something priceless, I was pretty certain, and so I chose to play it smart, and didn’t let it go. “I need time to think," I countered. "Call me back tomorrow. Give me time to do some checking…I just got it in.” As you’ve prob’ly guessed by now, she never called me back...and I have never seen that wealthy customer again. Late that night I finally found my book on old pianos. I looked the model up that stood there gleaming by my door. I almost puked as I would read, ‘If mint - two hundred dollars,’ and quickly prayed she wouldn’t find what she was looking for. That’s the hardest lesson that I’ve ever learned, my friend - concerning how to price an item bought for fifty bucks. And that disgusting, fateful day - a day when…two fools met - is one I won’t forget because, I’m telling you…it sucks!
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