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Yesterday I was in a little funk
because I got peed on by a big skunk
             took a long shower
              about every hour
discarded new jeans cos they stunk

        Alexis Y.

I’m upset I’m really dismayed
that skunky’s foul stench had been sprayed
on designer jeans
whose price was obscene
as one thousand bucks had been paid!

        Jan Allison

I've retrieved my jeans that were new.
The juice of tomato might do!
In such juice, all the stink
can soak out in the sink.
Don't go into my bad-smelling loo!
 
        Andrea Dietrich 

I will fix that mean criminal skunk
I am sure he's laughing, what a punk
He won't ruin anymore jeans
With my electric fence screens
Since my jeans are still stinky and shrunk

        Tania Kitchen

I put on the jeans - just a stain -
(I'd left 'em for weeks in the rain),
but then I despaired,
in horror I stared -
that skunk went and got me again...

         Jack Horne

This skunk has turned out a vile pest
on my jeans now twice she has messed
I called the skunk catcher
to come quick and snatch her
and place her under rodent arrest.

         John Gondolf 

My friend said that all animals must pee
And that its only a small patch of wee
But the smell was so bad
And I was hopping mad 
I vowed i'd hang the critter from a tree

I felt something warm running down my knee 
T'was dark and I wondered what can it be
I coughed and I spluttered 
Then curse words I muttered
Looked down it was a skunk peeing on me

          Tom Cunningham 

Darned skunk kept sneaking under the fence
to visit my black cat at my expense
thought I would get between them
in my best jeans, fate condemn
interrupted their starry vehemence  
       
           Eve Roper

I once was peed on by a stinky skunk
Stinky not quite the word-he stunk!
I tried each known cure
Retained his allure
I am still surrounded by funk

          ~Linda Fowler

Going home from the pub somewhat drunk
A vile pong in the air really stunk
There was worse to come yet
Now my shoes felt quite wet
'Cos I got peed on by a big skunk.

             Bill Brooks

I had a date with a handsome hunk
Got home and my ma said I stunk
When I undressed
Stuck to my vest
Snoring asleep was a baby skunk. 

I knew it was wrong on a first date
To get down in the hay in haste
Skunk must av’ been 
In my cast off jeans
Apart from that the date was great.

             Belle Bellevue

There once was a punk skunk named Stink
with a pert, pretty girlfriend named Pink.
Poor Pink thought it bunk 
that her Stink thought she stunk,
which he meant as a kindness (I think).

Well they visited church once, those two,
during Mass. All the children cried "Ew!"
Father said, "Let us pray" -
skunks both heard "Let us spray!"
Which is why a church bench is called "pew".

             John Wyatt

There was a lady skunk who used perfume
So she quite easily found her a groom
But on their wedding night
The poor groom got a fright
She lost her perfume and stunk up the room

             Gershon Wolf
A girl scout roamed in the woods fascinated
'Til she slipped in some funk where a skunk urinated.
When she returned to her troop,
They wouldn't let her re-group
'Til she bathed, burned her clothes, and stayed well-ventilated.

             Jim Slaughter 

















Alexis Y.
10/30/2020
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