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If I fall asleep 
What if I don't wake up
What if I scream and no one can hear me 
And no matter how hard I try, I still drown
The thoughts of this ever happening to me was frightening 
But if I'm not the only one with depression
Why am I the only one dreaming of this 
When I finally close my eyes, I feel like I'm being suffocated, my breath slowly fading away and my body still. No movement, not a single gesture.
The sound of rain pattering on the window pane 
The crashing of trees hitting the ground
The street lights flickering from the heavy wind
And then there was me 
Lying on my bed 
With too much on my mind 
Holding on to nothing more than my fear
I was forceful yet frail
I was still alive yet completely dead inside 
I heard a loud crash coming from the floor below me
I sprung up from my bed and hurried down the steps 
Everything entirely covered in water 
Everything I owned was drowning 
It would take me a long time to save the things that were most memorable to me 
I had to do what I thought was smart
Though, I wasn’t thinking right nor smart
Save other things, Not myself…..YET!
Fix other things before I even worry about myself
One foot in, six feet deep, reaching for my stuff
 I slowly drift to the bottom 
Wrong Choice, once again!
I didn't know how to swim, I never learned 
Never learned how to take care of my own needs
So I laid there flat and powerless
With my eyes wide open and a steady heartbeat
My body oh so cold with no feeling 
My mind oh so empty with no clear thoughts 
I felt paralyzed and useless 
It was crazy how I was unable to save myself
But did I really have to
I mean, afterall, Wasn’t I just dreaming?
But if I wanted to stop my suffering in real life, then I needed to at least try
It took me awhile to regain my consciousness  
My thoughts become somewhat clear again 
I knew I had something to live for
I definitely could get out of this misery 
I began to fight and fight and fight and fight 
I felt a painful shock run through the inside of my body 
It felt real, It was real
If I screamed nobody would hear me and just like that
Nobody did hear me 
And no matter how much I tried 
Nobody came to my rescue 
This wasn't a movie 
This wasn't a happily ever after 
This was real life...Actual feelings, actual thoughts, Actually, me fading away
There was no more use for me to fight any longer...I tried
I wasn't going anywhere 
I was just losing oxygen 
I was wasting my breath
My precious breath
So I let my body fall once again and this time I didn't scream, I didn't fight and I didn't try 
I could feel my eyes shutting, my heart stopping and all the thoughts that had been buried deep in my head were now erased 
And all at once, everything shutdown 
It was finally all over
“Here lies a young beautiful girl who died of depression, in her sleep as she suffered through many trials and tribulations throughout her life. She drowned in her sorrows, her pain and her agony. She drowned in a dream.” “Struggling one foot in six foot deep in the water you are already one foot in six foot deep underground.”
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