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Why I strayed, I know the reason, but do you? You’re the one that I fell into their arms, the one that I turned to
Although I told you then I never got too deep, but now I feel as though you need to know the reasons that your memory, I keep
I wasn’t loved, I was neglected, not cared about, I was an afterthought, a nuisance, someone that was just around
I never felt wanted, I never felt whole, there was no contact of any kind, no warm embrace, only at times for show

And then I didn’t want it, the contact made me cringe, the thought of being unhappy for the rest of my days almost brought my life to an end
In the beginning there was love, but not in the normal way, I loved him as a person, a friend, not in the romantic, life fulfilling of all my days
I guess that I was lonely, and he was there, I know this sounds awful of me to say, but in the beginning, I did care
I was never in love with him and I should have made that clear to him and myself from the start, but I wanted something to feel the void that I felt deep inside my heart

I had waited and waited for true love to come my way, and I guess that I just couldn’t wait anymore, so I decided to go another way
I agreed to marriage although it was wrong of me, I know, I knew then that he wasn’t the one, the other half of my soul
But I was tired of waiting for Prince Charming to come in and rescue me, I was too old to believe in fairy tales and things that would never be
So, I had resided to spend my life in comfortable misery, at least I wasn’t alone, at least then that is what I believed

But there was always something missing in the emotional sense, I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I knew that this was only pretend
I didn’t love him, and deep down I think that he knew, but he was willing to go along with the charade because he didn’t want to be alone too
We were more roommates than husband and wife and eventually even the friendship came to an end, there were no talks about our days and wondering how things had been
I had my space and he had his, and there was nothing between us two, just two people living in the same space because they didn’t know what else to do

All that time wasted because I feared being alone, all those years thrown away and my emotions turning to stone
But then one day out of the blue this voice spoke to me, and I swear in that moment I knew you were special, I can’t explain it, but you were the one for me
You made me smile again, the way that I hadn’t done in years, you gave me a reason to breathe and you took away all my tears
I soon found out that you were living in the same demise, that what once was had ended and you were unhappy with your life

You said that there was nothing left that you were so unhappy, and I felt that you were looking for the same thing just as me
We talked and talked for hours just praying that the conversation would never end, I knew I loved you from the first moment I heard your voice, but I also found in you a friend
Talking to you came so easy and I knew that you were the one, I had found the other half of me, in that moment I knew that I was done
Done with the searching, the longing, the believing that I was to forever be miserable in my life, because you awakened me inside and you completely changed my life

I looked forward to your calls and I couldn’t wait to hear and read the words that you would write to me every day, I have never met anyone like you that was not afraid to let their emotions show and say the things that they wanted to say
You gave me the courage to express myself and tell you how much that I cared, in the beginning it’s not that I didn’t feel that way for you, I honestly was just scared
I have never in my life felt the way for someone, that I felt for you, and it did scare me, because I was baring my soul to you
Someone that I had never seen that I had only heard their voice on the other end of the line, someone that I wanted to be with for the rest of my life

It didn’t matter what you looked like then because I fell in love with your soul, but once I did lay eyes upon you, I knew in that moment I was whole
You were everything that I had looked for my entire life, everything about you was perfect to me, your heart and soul, your beautiful eyes
The nights that we spent together, I wouldn’t trade for anything, you will never know what you mean to me and how happy you made me back then
It’s like your arms were made to hold me in them, I know it’s sounds crazy, but it’s true, there is nothing in this world I wanted more than to be there right next to you

The way that you held me, I could feel all your love surrounding me, and you didn’t have to say it, I could feel it from within, I felt at peace
With you I felt like I could be my true self, I had nothing to hide, with you there was no reason to try to mask my emotions, there was no need for a disguise
I showed you all of me, I let you in to the deepest parts of my soul, I told you things that I have never revealed, and you did to me as well, and I have never again told
I miss you so much, I honestly, truly do, I miss the way that you looked at me and your voice, your beautiful smile and every broken part of you

You made me feel alive, you showed me that true love did exist, you said things to me and changed my life, and with you I felt so much bliss
Your touch, your sweet kisses, the softness that you would convey, the way that you opened up to me, I remember it all to this day
I know that you were hurting, I know that you were torn about what to do, but don’t ever feel or think that I didn’t love you because I let you go, it was the hardest thing that I have ever had to do
I sacrificed the love that I felt for you, something that I have never felt in my life, I let my true love go and watched you walk away and return to your old life
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