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A legend of Ireland that lives long and hard through this very day
Is of Jack the widow’s son who took risks that truly did more than pay.
He and his frightened, broke mother were in dire need of food or money
So she sent him to fair to trade their branny cow, the one colored like honey

Jack came upon a crowd that was dancing in a merry happy way.
So he pushed his way in to see what was happening at the fair that day.
A wee man in the middle whistled, and a bee began playing a harp.
His mouse and bum-clock stood on their hind legs, to waltz and they were sharp.

The entire crowd began dancing in joy; even pots and pans were twirling ahoy.
The wagon wheels and cobbler benches were gyrating and whirling in joy.
The wee man offered Jack a really sweet deal. How would you like to be the master my boy?
Of all of these animals? It is not a line. Jack said “Sir, I would like it just fine.”

“I will give you the bee and the harp for that branny cow.” So the deal was made right now.
Jack went home and his mother asked how he had done. He took out the bee and harp for some fun.
The bee played the harp and the whole house danced, his mother laughed and twirled and pranced.
Then she sobered and said, Jack you were foolish.  If we do not get food we will soon be dead.”

The next day the same wee man was at the fair. The crowd was dancing a promenade.
The whole street was gyrating, it was a party for all. Jack had brought the black cow to trade.
Money this time, his mother had warned him, but that idea quickly started to fade.
“I will see you the mouse for that black cow,” the wee man said. Yes, Jack said, and wow!

The waltzing mouse made his mother laugh until she cried. She and Jack danced house inside.
When she stopped laughing she asked about the money, but the answer was not a bit funny.
“You are a stupid good for nothing fellow,” she told her son, and was none too mellow.
The next day she sent him off with the spotty cow, her last one, who was slightly yellow.

Of course Jack traded the spotty cow for the bum clock on the third day.
After being caught up in the frenzy of delightful dancing far and away.
When he brought the bum clock home it began to waltz with the mouse.
His mother and he nearly danced down the house!

She asked about the money. Of course there was none to be had.
He ended up at the roadside, thinking, about why mother was mad.
A wee woman came by with an idea that sounded crazy on the brim.
If he could make a princess laugh, the king’s kingdom would be given to him.

The King of Ireland’s daughter had not laughed for seven years.
What could do wrong? He headed to the castle with no fears.
If he could make her laugh, the kingdom and riches would be his. 
With the bee, harp, mouse and bum clock, this would be a whiz.

King’s castle had a ring of spikes all around the outside way up high.
The heads of other contenders for the princess’s hand were on each, oh, my!
Jack and his menagerie got two laughs out of the princess that day.
But he was afraid he would be leaving without his head without some fey.

For the deal was he had to make her laugh three times, not two.
Luckily the waltzing mouse knew exactly what to do.
The mouse flipped around whipping the bum clock in the mouth.
This made the princess laugh and laugh, so Jack’s head did not go south.

The handmaidens of the princess dressed Jack in a suit of satin and silk.
He sent for his mother, and they dressed her too in clothes as white as milk.
Their wedding lasted nine days and nine nights, and the bum clock and mouse played.
The bee strummed that heart royally, and his mother had her own upstairs maid.
So Jack was not as foolish as mother first thought; his bargains smartly made!
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