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Christmas Day in our house
Started serene
Everything orderly
Perfect and pristine
Guests were all greeted
As if best friends
Little did they realise
This would soon come to an end
The spread upon the table
A glorious feast indeed
All looked scrumptious
On which an army could feed
Then there was the drink
Oh! that demon brew
Guests started drinking
Not one or even two
Some imbibed on wine
Others supped the beer
Bottle after bottle seemed to disappear
Auntie Flo was taken bad
Her face went very red
Uncle Bill was looking ill
So they were carted off to bed
Someone turned the music up
It was already loud
Suddenly the family
Became a raucous crowd
Of people
Who had lost the plot
Uncle George was paralytic
Talking utter rot
Embarrassing his wife
Who never touched a drink
To add to her chagrin
George threw-up in the sink
Cousin Jack was dancing
And acting the fool
He danced out into the garden
And fell into the pool
The dog thought Jack
Wanted to swim
It looked so inviting
The dog jumped in with him
The music and laughter
Was deafening by now
Auntie Lil and Uncle Phil
Had a dreadful row
What started it
One may never know
Mum said Lil saw Phil
Kiss her best friend
Under the mistletoe
Dad said "cool it you two
It's not a day to row
Have another drink Phil
Shut up Lil for now"
Meanwhile in the kitchen
Things were getting hot
The Christmas pudding
Had slipped out of the pot
Onto the floor
Which of course made a din 
The door opened
And the wet dog walked straight in
Smelling the pud
He recognised the whiff
Of all the fruit and spices
He gave the pud a sniff
Feeling very tired
He was just a little pup
He marked the spot
On the pud
For later when he woke up
The door-bell started ringing
It had rung several times
The neighbours had had enough
They thought it was a crime
To be so dis-respectful
On Christmas Day
Not the time to put
This noise and rudeness on display
When eventually 
Someone heard the bell
The people in our house
Told the neighbours
To go to hell
Did they not know
It's Christmas
A time to rejoice
People in our house
Wanted to make amends
Offered a drink
So the neighbours had a choice
The neighbours thanked them
Said they would decline
They would like to get together
At some other time
All finished amicably
As hopefully it should
Meanwhile the pup
Had woken up
And was eating the CHRISTMAS PUD!
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