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His presence made me weary and I often felt frustrated with him in spite of the fact that I was his wife and should have felt more joy being near him. Instead of the marital bliss I’d yearned for when I married him I felt like a mother to a toddler who did things unnecessarily and in contrast of what I’d expected them to do. He would end up telling me I spoke to him like he was a child and I would always think, I know I do and I shouldn’t, but why, oh, why, must he act like that child I’m trying to treat like an adult. He is gone now and I’m aware that I should be feeling something other than a great relief, but,  even though I feel a little guilty for my feelings, I feel relieved and a bit better than I ever did in his presence. He was a frustration to me instead of a friend and companion. He made me feel like I was his mother and I was too young to be a mother to someone his age. He left me because I couldn’t be the mother of someone who was supposed to be my husband. For that, I am now feeling more alive and like moving forward with dreams that I might have pushed aside if he were still here with me. I pray for him but I am thankful for the separation.

A bird feeds her young
Then pushes them from the nest
To fly far away

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