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Crackling tension filled the community hall in Abergavenny ‘We are in this together dear folks for a pound or a penny’ Speaking of which the loos were situated right behind the bar To ensure that urinal relief was neither dribbling nor too far Augmented by audio loops Gwyneth introduced the procession And announced the category for the senior citizen’s session ‘Present your latest rage fashion with passion mothballs or not Let naphthalene ensure that mature fragrance never loses its plot’ Rosemary held on to the handrails and gleamed as she creaked In her hippie outfit with bangles and flowers’ nostalgia so to speak Last wore the outfit at Woodstock to the sound of Hendrix and Joplin Unaware that she looked like a rebel on steroids or ancient goblin True to her roots Anabelle came onto the stage in a mink coat Suspenders afro wig and purple umbrella oh my girl did she float Laced in white cotton she dreamt of a knight in shining armour To lift her off the catwalk as she had always been quite a charmer Jane’s cane was intriguing with mother of pearl inlaid at the handle She went forth to conquer in silk stockings and flip flop sandals Adorned with tiara and crimson tinted glasses she bowed to the crowd Not a pin could be heard falling before her wild fan club went loud With dental ornaments on false teeth Beth strode onto the platform Thick base on stilettos with plaster on bunions she caused quite a storm To applause of the audience she waved a catheter bag without stigma ‘Free to good loving home’ she marvelled always a splendid enigma Miriam was nearly disqualified for she did not sport that many clothes Always been a renegade quite young for her age and nubile she posed Her husband cheered on as he had adapted to her dazzling dementia ‘That’s my beautiful girl’ never too worried that her mind was in absentia Carmen rolled on in a turbo charged wheel chair quite close to the edge Steel nipples leather garment whip and shackles as she solemnly pledged Never to lose faith in rocking and rolling with a joint on blue painted lips ‘No hope without dope’ she exclaimed ‘cannabis has healed my old hips’ The jury had spoken everyone got a trophy and rose flower power bouquet Because octogenarians have the right to jubilation with ancient etiquette The moral of the contest is that mature women have plenty of fun to share As long as they defeat youngster’s misconception that they would not dare 02nd November 2019
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