Email Poem

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Poem
You don’t have to say I love you for someone to know 
You think someone means it just cause they say it, no 
I’ve tried all my life to find out what love means 
I thought it was easy, but trust me, it’s a lot harder than it seems 
God gave me the gift, he gave me the ability to write 
But that’s hard to do when you’ve lost your sight 
I’m not talking about my literal eyes
I lost the ability to see a future without my demise 
I see a broken man, with one too many bandages
When you pray for strength, God will give you challenges 
You have to overcome them in order to become strong 
I thought I had strength, but it turns out I was weak all along  
I’m nothing without you Lord, and that’s what really scares me
I sacrifice myself for others all the time, cause it’s my own worth that I can’t see
It’s easy to pretend to be something you’ll never be 
When I look back at it now, it’s actually pretty funny 
I look in the mirror and laugh at myself 
Did I think they would remember me as a friend or as something else 
Maybe a hero, someone admirable 
But then I realize that word is unfathomable  
Cause you can never give what you don’t have 
Maybe that’s why no one around me can find happiness or a reason to laugh 
I’ve been searching for a reason to even exist 
I hope someone relates to the heart I put in this 
Been alone my whole life, but not by choice
God’s the only one that’s ever heard my true voice 
My fiancée left me for a person I called friend 
If my life were a book, after that, it’d say The End 
Or maybe not cause I’m still here 
But if I ever saw her again, I’d say dear 
Thank you for teaching me that all I ever wanted was to feel wanted 
At first, when I thought of you, I was only haunted 
By the thought of never being good enough
3 years together and you broke up with me over Facebook, man that’s tough 
But now I can look back and smile cause we just weren’t right for each other 
You’re the reason I value the relationships I have more, why I can call someone my brother
So thank you again, cause you taught me how precious it is to find something genuine 
Cause that’s what lasts forever, and if it’s fake well forget it then 
I don’t have time or room in my life for fake
I need to be more like you God every moment that I wake 
You just read a page from my diary 
But don’t think with that, you can ever define me
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