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Poem

To my lovely wife (who has a great sense of humor)

Turning 50
You may think is nifty
But truth be told
It means you’re quite old

You may have more wisdom
And a walk in tub
You rate a new AARP card
Now here comes the rub

In order to keep 
A proper perspective
Let’s count the ways
You’ll become more defective

Start with the skin
It’s beginning to sag
Your voice will be changing
It’s morphing to ’Nag’

And without that skin staying 
Healthy and supple
Your boobs will head south
Making friends with your navel

And now for the Butt
Destined to enlarge
Ready for that scooter
Once it gets a full charge

You can scoot to the Doctor
He will be your best friend
That is, until
The inevitable end

Best check your insurance
Talk to Alex Trebek
And Colonial Penn
Better bring a big check

Good thing for you 
That your finances are set
Relying on S.S.
Was a really good bet

What’s that you say?
That fund is no more?
Where is the Lockbox?
We trusted Al Gore

Oh well, not to worry
You’ll have Medicare
No, not that either
You say it went where?

It was needed to pay for
Cell phones and cable
And for those that desire
To be labeled disabled

Then best to be careful
Try not to slip
Hang on to your walker
Let’s not break a hip
 
Stairs now are your enemy
Too hard to climb
Is it weakening muscles
Or that growing behind

When we are younger
Playing the fool
Growing a year older
Was always so cool

Reaching a half century
The truth will awaken
Now your old bony knees 
Ain’t the only thing shaking

More and more often
This fact will ring true
Everyone else
Is younger than you

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