Email Poem

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Personal Note:

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Poem

You say that I am so beautiful
Well thanks I guess
I'm sure you do believe I am beautiful 
But your belief can't stand up alone to the years of that one violently, force-fed bit    
of knowledge
I am ugly
Nothing can ever change that
You can't just destroy what I know in my heart of hearts
Years of pain, hurt, betrayal, abuse, they all speak otherwise
If I was beautiful then everyone would understand that
Sure they say that you can have your opinion and you can
But it doesn't hold under the assault of years evidence saying othewise
You're lonesome belief can't make me see what you see
What you see is biased by your love
What they saw wasn't
They saw the pure, unadutured view of myself and my life
They saw it and were disgusted
They abused me
They used me
They raped me 
They hated me
But they were right
I am not beautiful
I am detestable and disgusting
I am useless and worthless
You look and you see beauty
But what I see inside myself tell me you're wrong
Well thanks for trying
Maybe someday I can even allow myself to believe you
Until then...........

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