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Poem
I woke up from a dreamless sleep 
My vision came through fuzzy and confusing 
A cold, sharp ringing painfully pierced my ears 
And irritated every sense 
The familiar numbness stung my brain 
And caused a slow, panic educing chill down my spine 
Rising up from my bed was a challenge 
My head hung low as I rose from my bed 
And walked, or floated, to the bathroom 
I avoided the big mirror that hung on the wall 
And climbed into the shower 
As I turned the knob  
The shower became a torture chamber 
The water was glass, cutting into my skin 
Every drop sent a freezing cold shiver down my spine 
Though the water was lukewarm 
I panicked, my breathing getting faster and faster 
I barely washed an inch of skin before 
Shutting off the shower in a rush 
While climbing out, 
My eyes copied the mirror and fogged 
Following an instinct, I wiped the mirror clean 
Of its white steamy sheen 
And caught an unpleasant sight 
My face... that’s my face? 
It couldn’t be 
Staring back at me was a rough skinned 
Jagged looking face 
With a red, curling mouth 
And slanty eyes 
The eyes were big, black, sucking; 
I made a face, frowned, forced an uncomfortable smile 
They copied every move 
I started to grow hot 
The toxic, creeping anxiety that I knew too well 
Rolled up and down my body 
Who was this stranger that stared back at me 
In the glass? 
Why did I not know her? 
Because I still knew that she was me, but- 
It’s just too strange, I hated it 
The hot touch of the pain 
Crinkled my brain 
But I managed to pull my eyes 
Away from the mirror and continue in the numb 
Drying off was rough and uncomfortable, but bearable 
I stumbled out of the bathroom, and to the kitchen
My roommate met me at the kitchen table 
At least, I think it was my room mate 
Her face looked different; distorted 
I could barely hear or understand what she was saying 
She smiled so brightly, and gave me a big hug 
She vomited words that came in blobs and slurs 
I smiled back at her, because I could tell she was gleeful 
She was just so happy, and I wanted to be happy with her 
She reached behind her back and pulled out a card 
I could focus on the bright colors of the card which was good 
Her face became brighter as I turned the bright cover 
Inside were big, red, blurry letters that I had to shove my face into 
I, for some reason, could barely read or understand them 
“Hapfy Birdday?” 
I thought my birthday was in June, isn’t it August? 
She gave me a tighter hug, said something I didn’t hear
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