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When all else lays on eve’s mantle, this heartbeat stirs, awakening unto a flicker of midnight-- and I observe if the early jay had returned from its chilled dwellings … Not at this moment, not yet as thinning beams fade while my heels race out; struck by gray of darkness. Eventide bestows a time for pained outrage when the discovery of loved ones’ sudden farewell comes unforeseen, when ardent dreams transform into hostility… and glimpses trace a juggle of distant stars: my parents, my three brothers’ delicate frames perhaps roaming through a heap of wiry leaves as if crushed riddled by ingots on an embattled skyline ...dawn quickens heading eastward, until child-like hands fold in litanies of prayer denying I had lost them entirely: In the blue midnight, I wait, wait for their return in full knell from jay's anthem-- knowing the crypt of mortality terrifies this vulnerable abandoned being. Am I now a real orphan, life’s distraught survivor? Tell me, dear fate... because even the gods do not answer. .................. 1/03/2019 Caren Krutsinger’s My Loudest Feelings Contest ~ In honor of my brother who passed away last year~
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