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My heart stopped, you see
Three times, thanks to foolishness ...
But within the horror of it all I learned something ... extraordinary
And the following is, for ME, Heaven ...

     ~

There is a passing ...
Not passing from this life to oblivion
But from one reality to another
As if passing through a veil of matter, electric

This reality is of knowing, familiarity and pain
And the next, of delicacy and release ... and light
Some say a tunnel ...
But it is more a bridge with a striking brilliance at its end

There is no sense of isolation or uniqueness
None of the loneliness that we feel in our earthly human shells
Not an iota of the horrible separation of being trapped in a body
But rather an overwhelming sense of energy and purity

A connection to all other energies and spirits
No, MORE than a connection - the feeling is a unification ...
A melding with the Universe and all it contains
Oh, there is certainly a sense of being "self"

The ability to move and do and feel and imagine as we do here
But also the exquisite and sublime joy
Of being a vital part of "the whole"
Of being free of the pains and concerns of the worldly

And knowing the transcendent optimism of eternity and peace
The extraordinary and indescribable exuberance
Of touching the face of The Creator.
ALL is there ...

And in saying "all" I mean everyone and everything
That you have loved or has ever loved you
Not just those who have gone ahead
But those you thought you'd left behind

For it is timeless - past, present, future - all one
Whatever and whoever you loved that was behind the veil
Is with you now, and always has been
Those that left before you, are all there, with you

And they always have been
The joys of your life, even the smallest things, are with you
The moon, ocean, foods, kisses, sunrises, scents, tastes, colors, music
Every small and not-so-small experience

Laid out before you, like a carpet of whimsical flowers
All the faces you have missed, and the ones you thought you'd left
Are about you, though their spirits are, like yours, of light
You can see and smell and touch and talk to ALL

At once or individually, it matters not
And over and about and throughout, permeating everything
Is The Creator ... He/She/It has everyone's face and NO face
It is grace and forgiveness and kindness and contentment and, yes ... LOVE

But there is one thing that, even being connected to The All ...
You don't and couldn't expect
There is a horizon, and a distant one
It is very clear to every being, no matter where you go

No matter who or what you're with
And it is very dark, very foreboding, and inescapable
It is the veil, you see ...
The veil of death and hate and sorrow

It dances, darkly, like a thread of evil
And you know, despite the overwhelming joy and peace
That it is IMPORTANT and necessary
For it is the balance ... the yin to the yang

The reminder and proof of the price we pay, when mortal
The price we pay for everything that is good and loving and beautiful
The black to our white, the dirge to our aria, the down to our up
You can never approach it, no matter how hard you try

But it is always there ...
To make the light what it IS ... to make love what it IS
For without that dark horizon, the rest would have no meaning
No weight or measure or import

But it creates no fear or bad emotions
It is just ... there.
Most of all, there is peace, abiding
You swim it like warm water

It saturates everything, letting souls expand
And you are, like everything else, always expanding, moving, feeling
Completely aware of how eternal it all is
How eternal YOU are.

     ~

Of everything felt, I was certain, then, that I wanted to stay
That my previous existence was not the REAL one, not the TRUE one
That nothing could ever be as wonderful
But something ... someONE, some ... intent ...

Sent me back
Perhaps to share ...
Perhaps to learn, perhaps to just ... write this verse
To let others know ...

They need not be afraid
For The Creator's cheek is soft
And It's face ...
Smiling.





~ 2nd Place ~  in the "Crossroads" Poetry Contest, Silent One, Judge & Sponsor.
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