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Perhaps your life's plan was all mapped out for you from the start,
but I knew little to nothing about being a husband until I became one.
By that time, there is very little time to learn before confusion sets in.

"Honey, I have the snow skies and the credit cards, but we have to go back
because (are you ready for this?) it's snowing and  I forgot to bring the tire chains.";  "I never heard that...";  "I thought you said...";  "You spent how much at  Macy's?";  "What do you mean I can't watch that TV show? You got to be kidding.";  "You knew from the start that I was a sports fanatic. You can't be serious.";  And on and on it goes.                                                                                      

Confusion is like being stuck in the mud where it's hard to get out alone.  By the time you are humble enough to ask for help, you are deeper still. You don't realize it, but you are mimicking what you have seen growing up. For example, my wife had never met my father because he died long before we even met.  One day I was sharing with her about my father and his weaker traits. I was none too happy when she said to me, "You are just like him".  I didn't like her comment, but it was true none the less.                                                 

When we begin to realize the truth about mom and dad, we are more prone to live in denial because we thought we were smarter than they. But then we begin to understand that it's not about what we know or don't know, because there are so many variables and opposing forces stacked against our success that you may not have created, but when you notice them, there is no time for crying over spilled milk, and we have to be quick to learn that whining and spinning your wheels in the mud only deepen the hole.                                                                               

We learn sooner or later that our odds of succeeding are fifty-fifty at best.  Those are not good odds but we battle through the mind fields anyway because we are tough and not a quitter, and we are determined to never part company till but death parts the two of us.
07042018cjPoetrySoup
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