Email Poem

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Poem

I've been lying to myself 
I told myself that I don't care about you
Everyday got tough and we had good conversations but now they are as bitter as you 
So bitter that on some days I regret ever opening up the jar to give you my sugar 
I felt my heart sync as I wrote this line because speaking bad upon you never brought me joy 
Oh but you,
DearFriend ,You 
You found comfort in my sorrow.
And yes it's cliche but I never understood it until I lost you 
I've never had to be in your shoes and carry the depth,height and weight of your name.
So what made you think you were strong enough to spit bad on mine?
What made you think we got so comfortable you and I became one?
When did I ever let you know that I once carried a name that was never my own and found joy in its sorrowHave you become so bitter that my sudden joy makes you want to jitter
Have I not shown that even when we fall out I still have love for you 
Have I not shown you that even till this day your absence is felt 
You left a shadow and our memories will always be treasured 
But like you did,I hit breaking point 
My heart has sunk so deep that not even your presence will be enough to repair it 
So DearFormerBestFriendAgain
This is my final hello to you because I need you to give me my name back 
A name that you weren't supposed to carry.
A name you abused until it had no use.
And just like how useless it is to you.
Give it back to the owner it knows it's use and how to utilise it.
~Low-Key Poet??
-Sihle Simelane

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