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Poem
There I was,
In a big store, 
Picking up some VHS tapes,
Have thousands,
Need more...

I espied,
A curious thing,
A "Head Cleaner"
The curiousity bell,
Did ring

Well, I'll be damned,
Now I've seen it all,
I grabbed one fast,
Bought and exited the mall

I got home
And started hard,
To figure out how it works,
Such a wonder,
Surely not for jerks!!

Just imagine!!
No more washing
My face,
No more shampoos,
I guess you just rub it
On your head, 
Clean as a whistle,
And go to bed!!

So I tried this once,
I tried it twice,
I tried it again,
Didn't seem to work,
Now that ain't nice!

Leave it to me,
I'd picked up a defective one,
So back to the store,
I rushed the next day,
Exchanged it for another,
But come what may,

This one didn't work either,
Again to the store,
And I said "Hey!"
"Give me a good one!!"
They did as I did say,

Tried again,
For three straight nights,
Still didn't work,
Now time to stand up
For consumer's rights!!

The clerk saw me,
Frowned, but said,
"Was that one okay??"
I glared at him,
And spat out:
"Nay!!!"

I asked for the manager,
She came to me,
"What's wrong sir?"
"What could it be?"
"You're so upset,
I understand,
What is wrong??
I'll lend a hand!"

"This head-cleaner...
Just doesn't work...
Forget the price!
My face is still dirty....
I'm afraid I'll get lice!"

She looked at me,
Amazed to see,
Someone so stupid,
As I appeared to be....

"You misunderstand...."
She started off,
Explained what it was,
I started to cough....
And tried to shrink...
To as small as a bug,
Scurry out....
I'm such a dumb lug......

So if you think 
You know it all,
Before you have,
The biggest gall,
Explore the chance,
You may have misunderstood,
And possibly it's just happenstance,
You may spare yourself
Great embarrassment,
And the wish that
Your mouth was 
Filled with cement.
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