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The Romance of Poetry: How to Write a Romantic Love Poem

by Mark Pringle

Love poetry and romance are inescapably intertwined. For as long as there has been written language, poetry has been used to express romantic feelings. While many types of love serve as an impetus for writing love poetry, romantic love is the theme that wins readers' hearts.

What Romance is Not

Defining "what is romance" as related to love poetry is an exhaustive topic. Thus, we will start with "what romance is not." Simply put, romance is not a sex act. So, writing sexually explicit poetry as a way to arouse romantic feelings is a bad idea. It does not work. It will not foster romantic feelings in the reader. However, a well-written romantic poem can generate feelings of passion and erotic sensations. That leads us to our next question: What is romance?

What is Romance

Romance is a sensation rooted in a person's expectations. It represents a mythical journey of the mind, an enticing and thrilling story that evokes feelings of ecstasy and euphoria. At its core, romance generates excitement in a person's figurative heart. Romantic poetry aims to make the recipient feel good about themselves; these poetic expressions can motivated by infatuation or genuine love. Ultimately, romance is characterized by unselfishness and heartfelt expression.

The Chemistry

Contrary to popular belief, love does not originate in the heart. Instead, romantic love is a process that occurs in the brain, where chemicals are triggered, and hormones are released.

The Chemistry of Love and Poetry

In a Northwestern Medicine article entitled "The Science Of Love: What's Happening in Your Body," Leiszle Rae Lapping-Carr, PhD, a psychologist at Northwestern Medical with expertise in sex and relationships, states, "The mesolimbic system in our brain is what relates to rewards and motivations." This article mentions how neurotransmitters such as oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin stimulate romantic feelings and pleasure.

In the article "The Neuroendocrinology of Love," Krishna G Seshadri defines romantic love as  "...an emergent property of an ancient cocktail of neuropeptides and neurotransmitters."

While famous poets often link love to the heart, science shows more accurately that romantic feelings are a process of the brain, affecting regions of the brain rich with neurotransmitters like dopamine.

How to Write Romantic Love Poems

How to Write Romantic Love Poems

When writing a romantic love poem, it is fundamental that you think of the unique characteristics of the person you are writing about. What makes that person special to you? What situations, actions, or characteristics trigger the love neurotransmitters in your brain when you are with that person? Answer the question as to why you feel romantic feelings for them. Do you appreciate the way they treat other people? Is it their empathy? The triggers for writing can be something as simple as a person's smile. As you think about these things, write them down. Do not worry too much about how you want to say things; just focus on the special moments and uniqueness of the person.

Write Using Metaphors and Analogies

Once you understand why a person makes you feel the way they do, and you have written these down, rewrite those thoughts and feelings using metaphors and word pictures. Sure, you can say, "I like how you always think of others." However, the nature of poetry is to say things like this creatively and artistically. The real challenge in writing love poetry is expressing your feelings uniquely and creatively.

Do Not Use Clichés or Trite Expressions

When writing romantic love poetry, it is essential to avoid using trite or overused expressions that we may find in famous poems. The impact of romantic love poetry comes into play when the poet writes verses or phrases that have unique applications to the person to whom they are writing. When romantic clichés are used, it is an indication of lazy writing. Here are some romantic cliches to avoid:

  • depth of my soul
  • bated breath
  • one true love
  • my heart belongs to you
  • love's embrace
  • fan the flames
  • apple of my eye

5 Examples of Romantic Love Poems

An Excerpt of "Love" by William Wordsworth

The Moonshine stealing o'er the scene
Had blended with the Lights of Eve;
And she was there, my Hope, my Joy,
My own dear Genevieve!

An Excerpt of "How Do I Love Thee?" by Elizabeth Barrett Browning

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of being and ideal grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right.

"Her Lips Are Copper Wire" by Jean Toomer

whisper of yellow globes
gleaming on lamp-posts that sway
like bootleg licker drinkers in the fog

and let your breath be moist against me
like bright beads on yellow globes

telephone the power-house
that the main wires are insulate

(her words play softly up and down
dewy corridors of billboards)

then with your tongue remove the tape
and press your lips to mine
till they are incandescent

An Excerpt of "Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? (Sonnet 18)" by William Shakespeare

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimmed;

"Love and Friendship" by Emily Bronte

Love is like the wild rose-briar,
Friendship like the holly-tree --
The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms
But which will bloom most contantly?
The wild-rose briar is sweet in the spring,
Its summer blossoms scent the air;
Yet wait till winter comes again
And who wil call the wild-briar fair?
Then scorn the silly rose-wreath now
And deck thee with the holly's sheen,
That when December blights thy brow
He may still leave thy garland green.

A Beautiful Way to Express a Unique Connection

How to Write a Love Poem

Writing a romantic love poem is a beautiful way to express your unique connection with someone special. You can craft a love poem that resonates deeply with the recipient by understanding the essence of romance, tapping into the chemistry of love, and employing creative language free from clichés. Remember, the goal of romantic poetry is to evoke feelings of joy and admiration, making the subject feel cherished, loved, and unique. So, embrace your emotions, let your creativity flow, and allow your words to create a memorable and heartfelt tribute to the person you love. 



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