Get Your Premium Membership

Read Poems by Jan Allison

Jan Allison Avatar Jan Allison - LIFETIME Premium Member Jan Allison - Premium MemberPremium Member Send Soup Mail Go to Poets Blog Block poet from commenting on your poetry

Below are poems written by poet Jan Allison. Click the Next or Previous links below the poem to navigate between poems. Remember, Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth. Thank you.

List of ALL Jan Allison poems

Best Jan Allison Poems

+ Follow Poet

The poem(s) are below...



NextLast

Butt out - humour warning!


Bill prodded his sebaceous cyst ‘Twas massive the size of his fist It spurted green pus His wife made a fuss “Get treatment NOW, I must insist” Blue lighted to the A & E Huge spurting cyst medics could see Bill’s livid butt boil Made doctor’s recoil Needs lancing now, they all agree They bundle Bill onto a table “Don’t sedate him” said his wife Mable I will succinctly put He’s a pain in the butt I’m leaving him when I am able The medics gave Bill’s boil a prick Green gunky pus splurts, it’s so thick Poor Mable was heaving She said, “Bill I’m leaving Because you’re an ignorant dick” “You wouldn’t seek treatment for years Your constant moans left me in tears I’ll file for divorce I’m leaving of course I’m going to live in Algiers”! Bills visage turned ever so pale His final breath he did exhale The cad passed away There’s no more to say I’ve finished the end of this tale!

Copyright © Jan Allison | Year Posted 2025

NextLast

Post Comments

Please Login to post a comment

 
Date: 8/3/2025 6:14:00 PM

Jan, you are so funny! The way you weaved this into a story is fannytastic. The things that can happen!! Take care and smiles!!
Date: 8/3/2025 4:24:00 PM

Yes! Poor Bill! LOL. Thanks for sharing your humor and comedy dear lovely Jan! Best wishes! Have a wonderful day ~ hugs AA.
Date: 8/3/2025 7:47:00 AM

Only you could turn a sebaceous cyst into a riotous comedy of errors! The pacing, rhyme, and dark humor are spot-on—poor Bill, but I can’t stop laughing. A brilliantly gross and gripping tale!
Date: 8/3/2025 5:18:00 AM

I have a crystal clear mental image of it now, thanks to what you said. Your argument has me laughing my head off.
Date: 8/3/2025 3:09:00 AM

- I can understand that it can be uncomfortable to go to the doctor with that butt :))) - hugs
Date: 8/3/2025 3:02:00 AM

haha Hilarious!
Date: 8/3/2025 1:04:00 AM

Oh dear... that green puss got to me Jan. Poor guy... what a way to go. You surely did well with the rhyming here! ;)
Date: 8/2/2025 8:04:00 PM

so, i were having my evening meal when i came across this here write uv yourz dear poet JAN butt, i gots most uv it down anywho, worry not ") 'mongst us astute Jan; the reaction uv thuh reader iz what we az writers aspire to...any reaction iz the reward for us...and ya got one from me love, 'tiz my indext finger tickling that little thang, dangling in thuh back uv my throat...enjoyed...much love
Date: 8/2/2025 3:06:00 PM

Showing his butt once more, he passes away. Your words aren’t lovely, but you’ve made your point and most of us are laughing our butts off (saying at least here in America ;)
Date: 8/2/2025 2:50:00 PM

Jan, so hilarious and entertaining!
Date: 8/2/2025 2:34:00 PM

That's quite a tail... err tale. Que sera sara

Back


Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry