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Death You Hold a Scythe Over Me

Death you hold a scythe over me
i have waited for you
there is no trepidation here
i am a paucity of patience
i welcome you
the engine is long tired, hurting
parts not available to replace
i do not wish to shatter into pieces
in some long race to a finish line
i wish to leave somewhat sound
free of this pain i have carried
for far too long
where once i was lost in play
i suffer now across the spectrum
i seek the freedom you are 
not a future burden to loved ones
capable now of only menial tasks
it is time to leave
Byron was observant to the facts
we are in need of no more roving
reason and logic fail to see otherwise
Death you hold the scythe over me
you are the only anodyne
that will forever free me
of this mortal agony
that fills my sorrow with the dawn
where i slumber in the nightmare
bring me the immortality
with the memory of long ago
escaping the cacoon
wings unfolding
the gentle breeze that birthed
a horizon beckoning freedom
veins filled with joy
heart bathed in happiness
my prayers now plead
this must come to its finality
Death lower thy scythe
Death set me free of this
mortal coil 
let me wander those elysian fields
promised in my first breath
and make room for two because
the next one to tell me
God may have one more thing
for me to do
will be joining us

   OKC   8/22
Last year over 60% of drug overdoses were those who medically suffered from chronic pain. In my personal life, I have known two such individuals. The ending is almost a direct quote from one and I fully understand its somewhat harsh tone. Such good Intentions rub many wrongs, believe me. Lately, I have been studying Plath-Assia Wevill-Sexton-Woolf suicides but those were different reasons involving depression, not pain. Some of those, in my opinion, painted themselves into a corner they could not escape. Sad because all of them were talented poets. I worked in hospitals and am quite familiar with the agony pain presents in many cases where the outcome is assured, death. I live in chronic pain and 13 years ago left the treatment with opioids behind. I had help in finding a way out but we all are not the same and all cannot achieve this method. More states need to adopt the avenues available as in Oregon....hospital rooms are a better alternative to overdosing in the streets. We are kinder to horses with broken legs than humans dying for days with a bag of morphine dripping them thru days of agony.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2022




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Date: 11/13/2022 2:50:00 PM
Life is a trial, indeed i can emphasise although I am not suffering on this scale Timothy, my Best to you in Jesus.'
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Timothy Ray
Date: 11/13/2022 3:27:00 PM
as my front plate states....Life is a miracle deserving an attitude of gratitude.....
Date: 9/11/2022 11:04:00 AM
the sad part of the Le Bon Ton of poetry....they write themselves into a corner where the only escape is the door in the oven.... “For this moment, this one moment, we are together. I press you to me. Come, pain, feed on me. Bury your fangs in my flesh. Tear me asunder. I sob, I sob.” ? Virginia Woolf, The Waves.
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Date: 9/6/2022 9:42:00 PM
Dear Timothy, your potent pen spills a dramatic and expressive portrait of physical anguish. The plea for final release is poignant, the sad haunting beauty of which reaches down deep to linger. These lines are especially amazing; "bring me the immortality / with the memory of long ago / escaping the cacoon / wings unfolding".. The soul knows what it knows when ready to return from where it came. Soul-stirring poetry, my friend, with a great title and a striking finale. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
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Timothy Ray
Date: 9/8/2022 11:36:00 AM
thank you, Susan....yes i personally have lost 2 friends to this pain...one endured seven back operations. both had lives that required someone to help them in every aspect of life...having counseled in drug addiction i well know the hell of crawling away from the demands of the body and the mind too weak to overcome the coping condition, adding psychiatric disorders and you have the wall many never return from
Date: 8/30/2022 5:58:00 AM
I relate to this your poem, Timothy, being i too suffer from the complex of old age and its servant pain. I know there are far worst cases than i. But that guy, Grim with his scythe, is lurking. And i wait.
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Timothy Ray
Date: 8/30/2022 6:55:00 PM
yes harry....we deserve paradise...the Egyptians have a lovely piece of their mythology whereby the heart is weighed at the entrance and admission is judged upon your goodness....as i tell friends who are into Revelations...matters not when that tap on my shoulder comes...i am ready to leave...or as Saint Francis said...what are you going to do he said, keep working in the garden...we learned from Lot's wife...don't look back
Date: 8/27/2022 12:46:00 PM
A big problem you tackle here Timothy, openly and honestly, this nightmare cycle of endless pain and depression is indeed very real worldwide, death by euthanasia would appear to bring a happy release from these torments, after all other interventions have failed, but would have to be monitored very carefully, cheers David
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Timothy Ray
Date: 8/30/2022 6:59:00 PM
the saddest part in this equation is depression....the Road Not Taken is freedom from the self...so many in poetry wrote themselves into a corner...
Date: 8/27/2022 9:53:00 AM
Speaking from my own experience depression can be very physically painful As I suspect the downward shift of life energy not relegated to the mind alone.Good to see you in print my friend .
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Vickey Rhymer
Date: 9/5/2022 6:57:00 AM
Mr.Ray do you think the man you spoke of did this horribly selfish act so as to push himself over the precipice edge?
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Timothy Ray
Date: 8/30/2022 7:09:00 PM
depression is a horrible beast and the saddest part of it is as they say in AA, there are those who are not reachable...i personally know of one in which he killed his family....so it is very dangerous....i also know of those who develop a close personal relationship with God who has corrected the destructive path of "Meism"....the life of Edgar Allen Poe is a great eye opener of depression's outcome....he is what AA calls those who will never achieve a happy, joyous, and free life worth living....separating the blur between the psychological/coping conditions is a counselor's hardest sojurn....and one needs to remember Lot's wife, you have no other choice but to walk away
Date: 8/27/2022 5:06:00 AM
This is a hard one. Canada seems to have assisted suicides on the rise, and not always for pain, but because the person is deemed old and a burden. A slippery slope. Very glad you were able to choose a different path!
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Timothy Ray
Date: 8/30/2022 6:44:00 PM
we always have been on a slippery slope with the existence of "Death Angels" (nurses). there are now 6 countries and 5 states where it is legal. In England, the practice emerged of burying those who had committed suicide at a crossroads, with a stake through the heart. The practice will grow, it is only a matter of time before more countries and states add this. Depression is a sad tale but the fact is as they say in AA there are those who will never change and little can be done about it. In one case i know of personally he killed his entire family before he committed suicide. We can pray for wisdom but as we all know, humanity has proven short on this at times. My own educated guess, this is already happening in hospice care. Study the life of Edgar Poe, sad and totally predictable ending. Read the poems of the Le Bon Ton of poetry that committed suicide and their language speaks for itself..

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