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I Wish I Were Her

We have 72 hours to make this place presentable or we've got nowhere to live. Or at least not here. 
He helps with nothing. I sit, disappointed-again. Over something he's done. Again. 

I wish I were her. Heroin. I wish he lied for me.  I wish he wanted me with the same amount he does her. I wish he deceived his loved ones just to have me for a few hours. I wish when he was with me he felt whole. I wish I could make him lust for me as he does her. 
He makes love to me, and for long periods of time, but only because of her. 
Her narcotic charm is unmatched. Anything to do falls second to her. 
I need him to be happy and treat me nicely without the presence of her. Because when she leaves I pay, and dearly. 
I can't take him away from her grasp. He always goes back for more. 
Even if he says he is finished with her, I know I'll see some sign of her back around shortly. I know he doesn't need her. But sadly, I feel he doesn't believe the same. How long will he insist on this triangle love relationship? How long will she linger around us, if only in just thought? Forever?
I know in my heart that she trumps anything I could ever dream of giving or doing for him. Doesn't he see that she is nothing? She destroys. That is all she is. A homewrecker. Toxic. Death. Suffering. Pain.
Is this what he Longs for?

Copyright © Maryann Nope | Year Posted 2018

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