God's Love
When I was young love was a game
I did not think about it when I took his name
I love him, I need him is what I would say
“I will show you we can make it one day”
At first it was a fairy tale, a dream come true
Till one day I awoke beaten, degraded, abused
It started with names degrading and untrue
He would say, “don’t look at me, the blame lies with you”
“Your worthless, your ugly, who would want you?”
Then leave my lying there bleeding and confused
“I’m sorry I will never do it again” was the excuse
I would accept his apology with that the abuse
I dealt with the lying, cheating and names
Till one day that frightening time came
The day I thought would never happen to us
The day I realized leaving was a must
The final straw that broke the camels back
When I realized I needed to leave and never look back
He pulled out his gun and said the world would be better off
If he would just simply shoot me then he would scoff
I looked at my children frightened and scared
Could I forgive myself if he touched even one little hair?
Next time he could stab me, shoot me, or worse
Maybe next time I will drove away in a hurst
I am better than that no matter what that man says
Who know why these crazy ideas fill his head
I am here today because I was strong
I did not give up and I know he was wrong
I am beautiful, worthy, intelligent, and free
I took the time to search and what I found was me
I deserve better, I deserve love
And each day I pray and thank God above
Thank you for showing me I was stronger than I thought
And in that destructive web no longer am I caught
I am a mother of three and there’s no bigger joy
To still be here today and help assemble their toys
To help them to read, write, and show love
TO teach them that hating and hitting they are above
IT is hard to think I may not be here today
If it was not for God’s love that showed me the way.
Copyright © Dawn Swain | Year Posted 2006
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