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Best Poems Written by Rachel Holland

Below are the all-time best Rachel Holland poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

The Make Believe Man

Why did you say yes when you really meant no?
Why did you stay when you wanted to go?
Why did you convince me that you were so in love with me?
Why did we sit up all night drinking wine until three?
Why did you hold my hand and tell me that we were to grow?
Why did you promise me the things that would never be so?
Why did you hold me close and cry tears of joy?
Why did you say I was your soul mate when you always planned to leave?
Why did you read me fairytales?
Then kissed me so sweet?
Why did you lie beside my body every night?
When it didn’t mean a thing.
Why did you paint dreams in my eyes?
Why did you lie to me?
Why did you then search for reasons to leave?
Why did you shut me out in the cold
And plan on never saying goodbye to me?
The night you left
My life turned black

You had given me beer when I asked for tea
And did I mention that I know you lied to me?
Words built on flimsy, torn paper
Yet you managed to get the very best of me
Months I blamed myself
For the disappearance of you
You see now I question what other false words were said
Or how you could live in the knowing
Then sleep soundly beside me in my bed
The puzzle fits
The instinct was right
Now no more tears can be shed 
For the make believe man
You see all of these things I will never know
Or why you said yes
When you really meant no

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

I Want To Be Your Bride

I want to be your bride
No beating around the bush

I want to wear a white cape
And mouse ears
I want to blow raspberries at your loved ones

I want to dance 
Alone
On a table to our song
I want to eat the best bits of the cake
And lick the icing
When no ones looking

I want to make a speech
When I’m drunk
And call you by an ex-boyfriends name
I want to sit on your Mothers knee
Thinking it’s you

I want to arrive an hour early at the church
In the rain
And wait outside
I want jesters and clowns in bridesmaid dresses
To follow me around all day

I want a ring
I want five rings
One for each finger
And thumb
Just in case I lose one

I want an orchestra of mice
To make your relatives dance
I want to take you to bed
And sing you nursery rhymes as I undress
I want you my darling
Don’t you want me too?

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

Suburban Dream

I can be your sister and your brother
Your husband and your mother
I’ll bake and clean and treat you mean
Be your quarter back on our own private team
I’ll prepare your meals and iron your clothes
Leave your supper on the table as I walk out of the door
Let you wonder if I really am at the store?

I can be your superhero and save your life
I can be your number one fan, your right hand man
Your enemy sinister and wise
You are my teacher when I cross the line
And I’m your master when you say your mine
Sell my body and soul to keep food on your plate
Let you believe no one has ever touched me like that

I’ll be your secretary when your too weak to speak
You can use and abuse me and make me feel cheap
I can be your very best childhood friend
Your nurse by your side at the very end
I’ll keep you sane as you lose your teeth and mind
Tell you the world hasn’t really changed outside
Place flowers in your hair as your body starts to fail
Cut your food into pieces when your hands become frail
Smile and tell you that all is well
When inside I’m dying and feeling like hell

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

Alternate Reality

The lonely evening falls again
The night is fast becoming my favourite friend
Where the moon it shimmers all over your skin
Let out the bad vibes
Invite the freedom in
Ride we must our dreams through the night
The hazy traffic stickiness fading
Leading traces of forgotten memories
Blank as these sheets of paper the future awaits
The past flutters, torn out notebooks
Ashes in the rain
It was there I saw you
Lying in the dirt
Blackened eyes crying
Little fingers tug my senses open
A drugged-up film
These memories toxic and sweet
Passing through veins and skin
Flesh and bones
Everything will break
Only the strong will survive

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

I

She calls I a thousand names
The black witch of the south
The I in evil
The nothing that lies between
The namesayer
And the timekeeper
The thousand ticking boxes
The terror in the midst
The horseman and the thief
The alien and the astronaut
That came knocking
The air that sucked her lungs
The bitter aftertaste of sugar
The candle that burns bright
The penny that stole the truth
The fantasy leaping from the page
The trouble in the woods
The headline and the news
The temptation that makes men blind
The kiss of death
The final straw

Yes she calls me all these things
And yet all I offered was love

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

I Don'T

I don’t want to talk about mum
About the bonds that tie us together
Like two leaden weights
I don’t want to hear
About how I should be
More this and that
About how I keep breaking the mould
On which you consistently reapply

I don’t want to listen
To how your problems are mine
About how I’m not good enough
About how I upset you
About how I’m not like you
About how I let you down
About how worried you are for me
About how you don’t see me for days, weeks
I don’t want to know
About your emotional strings
Sticky you throw at me
I don’t want to feel
Less than I am
At your expense

I don’t want to reapply my make up
Brush my hair
Wear the coat I hate
And that does not fit
I don’t want an analysis
Or to be told that you know best
I don’t want a hug
Laden with treaties and hidden agendas
I don’t want an empty promise

I don’t want it
What your offering

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

Venus Loves

This is my Achilles heel
The damage bound as best I could
This is where the crack splits
The rip fits
The embers flame
The rivers flow
Why should I care if I’m feeling quite alone?
Perfect freedom
I topple off the edge too easily
How can it be that I am you and you are me?
Counting the hours and seconds
A game for fools
The package we made
Sewing up the stitches you pulled
Mending the torn apart holes
Which were starting to sag and fray
I pack my bags like I’ve become accustomed to
Ingrained in my soul
Searching far and wide
In this canyon inside
A death, a death too many to tell

This bruise on my hand fading
The landscape constantly changing
Goalposts reaching never returning
To the places that made me
Echo’s in the distance 
Of a life that time forgot
Toxins and disease fill my body
Whenever you are near
Walking barefoot on broken glass
So we can be as one
This doesn’t feel like home
Only a place I anticipate
Bargain with
No happy ever after here my friend

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

Fairy Tale

You woke something that had slept for a thousand years
Wrapped deep in thorns and history
You gave me something real
Currents that could never be fathomed
The tidal waves engulfed me
You reaffirmed something that I always knew existed
Filled in the gaps with crayola
You made it seem so simple
You are everything I am not
And you’re all that I am

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

Borrowed Time

Borrowed time, borrowed time
We’re living on borrowed time
Selling our lives for a dream home
Ripping up the carpets
To lay our lives down
New china
A drape to please the eye
This borrowed time will drag you down

If everything was free
Then would we still care?
If this ornament stood here
Or this tablecloth complemented there?

Borrowed time
Your selling away
Your life’s work
Bought you a pretty new chair

Hitch up your skirts
Sell your Tupperware
Eat your supper off the floor
Drink straight from the tap
Walk the ten miles to work
Time to get your time back

Details | Rachel Holland Poem

The End of the Beginning

Don’t come near me
When you don’t know the tears that I’ve cried
Don’t know the pain that I hide
Don’t pretend to understand
When you don’t know all that I’ve seen
Don’t know all of the things that this body has been

Don’t try to hurt me now
When it’s only just that I’ve survived somehow
Keep away from this girl 
If you don’t have a clue
Of where I’ve been or what I’ve been through

Someone once told me that they saw everything in my eyes.
How I know what its like in hell.
Well he’s right and its true.
It’s dark and dangerous and full of despair
I have seen dirt on the floor
I have seen starry skies through teary eyes
Holding onto these memories has cost me dear

Last night you haunted me in my dreams
It was beautiful and life seemed bright
The waking light revealed the hidden truth
Behind your stretched smile the curtain slowly draws
I can see only the silhouette 
Of your strung out stage bow
And I understand