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Nikki Juarbes Poem
I know your miserable
I'm a reflection of you
I know the wanting and needing
There are times of wanting the screaming
I hate how you act toward me
I know you see what I see
I look in the mirror and see you
This is a reflection,A reflection so true
Our hearts sealed up
Points in our life we gave up
There are things we used to hide
Just because we have our pride
Feelings were never to be shown
I came out the only way I've known
We have a little girl inside
We both hate when she starts to cry
This is a reflection I see
Yeah with the way we fight it's hard to believe
We feel the same pain
Just too much pride to maintain
Mom you know as well as I do
I'm a reflection, A reflection of truth
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
Too much pain she hurts,cries
Way too much pain for anyone's eyes
He walks in the door smacks her down
She looks up at him with this frown
Confused lost and alone
No friend,feelings or thoughts of her own
Too much pain she hurts,cries
Way too much pain for anyone's eyes
She sits alone sealed and hurt
Waiting around for another out burst
He has no control over himself
Too much pain,pride to ask for help
He feels like the worlds on his shoulder
He wants to hug and grieve and console her
But rage seeks within his head
So much pain too many regrets
Too much pain she hurts,cries
Way too much pain for anyone's eyes
she prays real low
And moves real slow
Trying to keep her faith and hope
He has no control over himself
Too much pain,pride to ask for help
Not realizing their doing the same thing
Battling their burdens trying to maintain
They hurt they cry
Way too much pain for either one's eyes
They have no control over them self
Too much pain,pride to ask for help
So they both grow old
Not knowing what each other holds
The pain starts to blind
And starts consuming the mind
So now their gone
Living life all wrong
Too many risks they take
Far too many mistakes made
Two souls will be lost
Because of the silence they fought
Look what they have given in
Something never given the chance to begin
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
The often tears my heart does shed
Looking back at everything I dread
My heart was something I had locked
Didn't know it was there nearly forgot
My heart cried a lot of tears
But no one was there to hear
So as it slowly breaks
I have one decision to make
To let god come in
The only person considered a true friend.
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
It's me the one you want yet push away
Your scared to be hurt far to afraid
I'm not here to cause you harm just want to love
I don't think twice your the only person thought of
I haven't went away not just yet
But its kinda hard to stay if you wont accept
I can't say that I didn't get hurt myself
Point I gave up and sent people to hell
But when you think about it no one wants to be alone
And you found someone that you can call your own
So all I ask is for you to let me love you
Lets try something most people fail to do
Our hearts both call for the same thing
Your pain is something u should try maintaining
I'm here and not going anywhere
I'm fighting a battle and showing I care
I don't want to cry cause of your lack of faith
I want to smile, hug and cradle your face
I love you and I know you do to
So just just let me keep loving you
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
I tried telling you
But you didn't see me or did you?
Did you pretend I wasn't there?
Are you pretending now to care?
Can you really see my pain?
Do you know why I stay?
If my feelings aren't true
Why must I keep holding on to you?
When I hurt do you go numb?
Are these questions I ask dumb?
Why must I crave for you love?
It's as if its more powerful then things above
I see you but you don't see me
Can you tell me could this really be?
I needed you and you weren't there
I grew up leaving in fear
Fearing that I might be hurt again
Cause I been hurt most of my life by family & friends
People that I thought were true
Yeah mom you know your one of them to
Thats OK because I will always continue to love and cherish you.
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
I know a girl she speaks within me
She's smart and funny sometimes friendly
She has her ups and her downs
Just tired of people here thats never around
What she seeks is some support
She speaks of hard times that shes fought
Her anger is over powering
She starts lacking as a friend
So bitter she grow cold
Suffering but nobody knows
Trouble seeks within her head
Bad thoughts and so much regrets
A long time of pain is in effect
Thats when she loses all signs of respect
Looks down on herself
No longer searching for help
She smiles these fake smiles
And continues to ignore the pain for a while
The girl life has changed to the bad
She grew more bitter and very sad
Now she a waits the truth
And keeps dreaming that this pain will end soon.
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
I think your a very selfish man
You don't care enough to understand
Sit here tell people of their wrongs
What the hell makes you think your strong
As if you done nothing to hurt anyone
Instead of being a man you would run
Hurting people is something you do so well
If it was up to me you'd burn in hell
See I'm not OK or alright
No don't sit there and say i just want to fight
I'm dealing with things within me
You just won't let me be
Saying I'm no good because your angry
Well your worthless and nasty
Do you know what I think at night?
Have you no idea what I fight?
Well let me tell you how it goes
It's time you should know
I've been through hell and back
You swear you know everything and you don't know jack
I sit at night and cry
Sometimes pray that I would die
I feel like I lost my mind
Finding myself is the most complicated thing to find
Did you know I beat myself up?
Guess you didn't cause you stuck up
I don't have anything to help me out
I would love to rip your heart out and watch you shout
claming to be my father who wants the best for us
Yet you slept around and broke our trust
I got beaten for your mistakes
Now I hope its your heart that breaks
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
You don't know me at all
Didn't help you watched me fall
Do you know anything about me?
Do you even know what I yearn to be
How can you lie to people about my life
Your just angry and tired of being a house wife
I know that your ashamed of me
Didn't want others to know I was attending GED
Saying I had finished school
Making me feel pain and look a fool
I messed up because of you
And everything you put me through
Did you know I love books
No you didn't you never bothered to look
Said that I was a bad child
Thats funny your my mom but never around
How can I be the worst when I've done nothing
Even with all that I continue hurting
Calling me out my name
How do you expect me to stay sane
Taking his side as if he cares When he hurt you your kids were there
The pain he put you through
Now you act as if were the liars and his words are true
You used to be so strong
He made you weak and I'm telling you your wrong
You judged me now it's my turn
I want you to fell the pain and burn
We both know what he did to us
But you push me away and him you trust
Your family is very ungrateful
Very bitter and hateful
I just want you to open your eyes
Yearn for you to break down and cry
Tell me that you really need me
Say your sorry for hurting me and free me
Tell me you want to be hugged
I want you to know what it feels like to crave for love
As you do this trying to be free
I'd know you felt my kind of pain and misery.
Poetry
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
Why do you want me to be like you?
Your sad and miserable you know it's true
Coming at me with all that fighting
I start feeling rage and a little violent
My heart starts to race with a different beat
What more do you expect of me?
Say I have to learn to work in the house
Is that my fault you think thats what life's about?
You've chosen your path not me
I'm not a house wife
Thats not my life
This anger that you make me feel
Only makes it harder for my wounds to heal
If you can't be sweet thats alright
But stay away if you want to rage and fight
I'm facing a battle within myself on my own
So don't add on to it just let it go
I see the anger in your face
You want to leave you hate this place
That's fine cause I feel the same way you do
But do you see me blaming everything on you??
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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Nikki Juarbes Poem
We departed in so many ways
When looking at it it's hard to say
The veins in which throbbed for you
All lost in the blizzards of life and another bruise
You went your way and I went mine
That's crazy what is seen now means we were blind
The damage was great, way to much
The hugs the kisses every last touch
The sorrow hidden within these walls
And the insane memories of our down falls
The life in which we have created
Is now a lost memory and ended by hatred
Who would have thought such gifts
Could ever and will be lost in the mist
This world is cold enough
But seems frozen with this departed love
I feel great to have experienced this
For the message wasn't missed just the start of awareness
Copyright © Nikki Juarbes | Year Posted 2007
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