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Best Poems Written by Gordon Andrews

Below are the all-time best Gordon Andrews poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

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12
Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Immigration Policy

All immigrants or persons migrating into Australia shall be extended no more courtesy that the average Australian unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
No financial aid will be offered to any person migrating to Australia unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
24 months after becoming an Australian citizen will be first time a migrant shall be allowed to claim for any financial assistance of any sort from the Australian government unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
All Australian traditions, icons, beliefs, and religions shall not be defaced in any way; if they are then the person or persons responsible shall be required to leave Australia and citizenship and passport will be revoked unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
All immigrants shall follow Australian law
 
No employer shall be allowed to pay a migrant a lower rate of pay than an ordinary Australian would receive in the same position in accordance to the award wage. If an employer is found guilty of underpaying workers they shall be shipped to PNG and passport revoked after reimbursing twice the amount of money owed unless unusual circumstances can be justified

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013



Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Escape On a Bike:

The tune of the pipes 
Calling your name 
As the bike warms up 
And awaits your arrival 

Weaving and swaying 
Through the concrete jungle 
Dodging and ducking 
Traffic lights and cars 
Pollution drives us 
Out of the city 

Cleanse our faces with the salt 
From the sea
As we rumble past 
The roaring ocean 

You and I 
Melting together  
Racing along the 
Foothills of the mountain 
Washing out our lungs 
With farm fresh air 

The tune of the exhausted pipes 
The angelic manurers of the bike 
Are romancing the mountain 
As the bike becomes alive 
And protect us like a lover 

The overspray of the waterfall is
Washing the city out of or hair 
Replacing the oxygen in the 
Paws of our skin 
Exciting our sensors 
Wetting our appetite 

Launching out of the forest 
Racing along the plain  
Travelling faster than light 
Floating into space 

The Engine running on galaxy gas 
The tyres run on star dust 
Our journey never ends 
And quit frankly my dear 

With you by my side 
And a highly polished bike 
I never want this journey to end

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013

Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Guts, Determination Blood Sweat and Tears

Guts, Determination Blood Sweat and Tears 
Who can say they have not used that combination
That is the combination that makes famous people, heroes and idles  
What is the difference between famous people, heroes, idles and you 
The amount of followers 

Let’s look at a famous people/ heroes/ idles

They have the guts to do something different 
They have the determination to do it the best they can 
They have hurt themselves for what they believe in 
They have cried when it all went wrong 
 They have raised a sweat just to get it right 

I want you to look at your life 
Through the eyes of your family 

You have the guts to make your family get out of bed 
You have the determination to help your family be better than you 
You have lost blood for each member of your family  
You have sweated your butt off to ensure comfort for your family 
You have shed a tear more than once for you family 

Why do we like famous people, heroes and idles  
Because they do something better than we can 
They make what they do look easy 
Famous people give us ideas, dreams and hope
But most of all 
Famous people, heroes and idles are people that we admire 

You have become a master at what you do 
Day by day you give love 
Day by day you give hope 
Day by day you share dreams 
Month after month your kids keep coming back to you 

With out knowing what you have done 
You have year after year 
Created a hero for your kids to idolize 
You have given advice to your friends 
You have shown kindness
You always manage to give away a smile when it is most needed
You have had a positive effect on others as well

You are: 
My Idol
My Hero 
My famous person

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013

Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Me Mate, the Prime Minister:

John Howard,
No GST ever, if you vote me for Prime Minister
Remove tax from petrol
Change the word tax to levy and increase the levy to 48%
John Faye,
The average Australian should not be able
To afford a car or a house
John Howard,
Child overboard
Oh no, my advisers got it wrong
But it got Little Johnny voted back in
Just so he could outsource
The Australian job market
Make the Rich, filthy Rich
Remove middle class
And the Poor, become Poorer

Kevin 07
Apologizes to Australia's Indigenous peoples
Build a town for asylum seekers
Leads the revolution on education
Dives in, too fast, when insulating
Australians against the cold
Lets his soft heart over-rule
His heads when it comes to rules for refugees

Julia
Carbon tax here I come
After taxing the mega rich so they charge
Australians more for their products
Lady PM found the stolen generation
And made it a new business
While killing Liberal’s Work Choices
Julia is no Celebrant, Wayne Swan is no witness
But the government recognizes gays as
People with partners and taxes them accordingly
Julia will not preside over anyone’s wedding vows
She leaves that to the church
And lets the Pope interpret the Bible
To recognize same-sex marriages

Kevin Election
Abolish carbon tax
Palm off asylum seekers

Tony for PM
Ladies
Bare foot in the kitchen
All businesses are
Franchises or Chain Shops
Scrap family-owned business
Enforce all Little Johnnies policies
And make the Rich, Mega-rich

Confused?
Well don’t be
Let’s revert to
The mate system
Where mates look after mates
You can afford to go the pub for a beer
The electricity and gas bill is lower than the
IQ of a Politician
You can afford a new car every 2 years
Your house mortgage is paid off

Me Mate, The Prime Minister
Vote for Gordy
He’s unemployed and needs a job
*****knows what he’ll do
Hell knows how he’ll do it
But I guarantee we will all
Have one hell of a party doing it
Bare foot in the kitchen or wherever
It will be memorable
Time to vote
Time to party
Give Gordon Andrews your Vote
Me Mate, The Prime Minister


(c)2013 Gordon Andrews

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013

Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Dead Beat Policy

A wingding Aussie will be defined as any single person thru to a minority group determined  to be making a complaint containing false information or complaints of no substance about businesses, governments, government employees, organizations or not for profit organizations and if approaching the government requiring changes made to any official documentation they shall be known as Dead Beats
 
If the changes or complaints are deemed to be unsuitable, not required, or of no substance, the person or each person in the group complaining or requesting the modifications/changes will be billed $150.00 a day per person involved in the investigation, from the initializing of an investigation to and including the day of finalization. Weekends and public holidays shall be included at normal overtime rates
 
Every member of the Dead Beat group shall be individually billed. The bill shall be known as the Dead Beat Bill (DBB)
 
If any member of the Dead Beat group is found to be in Australia on a visa of any sort and receive a DBB they shall also be required to hand in their visa and leave Australia
 
Examples of complaints:
 
A complaint about the noise from an airport, industrial area, recreational area or club that was established before the residence moved into or was born into the neighbour hood of complaint is a complaint of no substance unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
Applications for a shopping center, house, building, park or religious area that require a town meeting shall be known as unsuitable complaints unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
Dress or language complaints about Australian icons such as Bugs Bunny, Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Humphrey B Bear and others shall be deemed not required groundless unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
Adding amendments to a legal document that require changes to Australian beliefs, customs, traditions or icons shall be deemed unsuitable, not required and of no substance unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
Any Australian government employee that fits these requirements shall also resign from their position unless unusual circumstances can be justified

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013



Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Sunrise, Television Talk Back Show:

The mild soothing voice
Of the bald Financial Guru
Is spreading the needs of others

While the lovely bouncing
Voice of Mel, charms an interview
With gentle kindness she will
Invite you to reveal your soul
And commanding vocal manner if needed
Will highlight the error of your ways

With a dry sense of humour
Kochie introduces a controversial topic
Bringing in his lovely guests he introduces to us
The 3 Wise and Wonderful Angels
A panel of Beautiful, Intellectual, Fiery girls

Voices rise
Chatter increases
Left, right and centre
The topic is being
Clawed apart

From the dark deep depths
Rises Kochie with
A soothing voice that
Calms the devilish conversation
Soothing any ruffled feathers
And a joke that needs a
Coffee to wash it down

With the confidence and appeal
That can only be provided
By a professional sportsman 
Beretts takes us into and behind
The Wide Wonderful World of sport

Bringing us back to reality
A beautiful smile on a serious face
Natalie inform us of day to day
Events that occur around and beside
The life we call ours

A personality jumping out of his skin
Through the radio waves and into your face
Conning a life style of luxury
While telling us we will be
Freezing by midday and melting by midnight
With a short mans stature 
Grant can laugh at himself

Mark, Melissa, Kochie, Natalie and Grant
Kicking back in a leather lounge
Bantering between themselves
Drawing our interest
And sharing their happiness
Introducing light entertainment
Easy on the ears, soft on the eyes

Together from when the sun rises
To the lowering of the curtain
With a smile
And a laugh
Through
Rain, Hail and Snow
On with the show we must go

Every morning
To say thank you
We invite the team to
Join us for breakfast

(c)2013 Gordon Andrews

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013

Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Me Mate the Pm, Financial Policy

Household income to be defined as company/personal phones, company/personal laptops, company/personal furniture, and company/personal vehicles including petrol; if you have any people working for you their income will be taxed as part of your income
 
Bonuses, Director Fees, wages and bonuses, bank interest and contractual payment shall be treated as second and third jobs and taxed accordingly

Maximum house-hold income without partner under $35,000.00 taxed at 0% including second and third jobs 
Maximum house-hold income with partner under $70,000.00 taxed at 0% including second and third jobs
 
Maximum house-hold income without partner under $90,000.00 taxed at 25% including second and third jobs 
Maximum house-hold income with partner under $180,000.00 taxed at 25% including second and third jobs
 
Minimum house-hold income without partner over $180,000.00 taxed at 35% second and third jobs taxed at 40%
 Minimum house-hold income with partner over $180,000.00 taxed at 35% second and third jobs taxed at 40%
 
Retirement tax will use the above criteria except 25% will be reduced to 15%, 35% will be reduced to 25% and 40% will be reduced to 30%
 
Company taxes shall be identical for every registered business as per The Australian Business Tax Reform
 
If false documentation has been supplied leading to financial gain to either party, the person writing and signing that documentation shall be financially responsible for the debt, and responsible for the person for whom  it was written for one full year one unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
All nationalities will be seen as financially equal unless unusual circumstances can be justified
 
Unemployment payments shall incorporate these changes
 
•	Financial benefits shall be increased by 20%
•	Unemployed people under the age of 21 shall not receive rent assistance unless unusual circumstances can be justified
•	Single parents shall only be allowed to claim for one child after meeting the Australian Single Parent Guide unless unusual circumstances can be justified
•	Unemployed people unfit for work shall supply a medical certificate that falls within the Australian guide lines certifying them to be unfit for work
•	If unemployed people under the age of 45 have been on benefits for 12 months, had 3 job offers and are fit for work, they shall be recruited by the Royal Australian Forces to Beautify the Country (RAFBC).  If they have migrated here from another country and fit this criterion they shall be requested to leave the country and lose all benefits immediately. Note: If you are over 45 and fit for work you shall be found a position in the RAFBC to suit your qualifications unless unusual circumstances can be justified

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013

Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

2st

Time warp
1979 2ST started to broad cast
In the Southern Highlands as AM radio
1999 2ST started to transmit in FM
Although these are land marks
The biggest gamble is yet to come
In 1982 2ST hired Graeme Day

Present day
Or is it Graeme Day
If you are a local you know
There is
The right way
The wrong way
And Graeme’s way

Graeme may not be right
But he is vocal about his way
With a heart of gold
A level head full of information
Combined with a sense of humour

Graeme’s love affair with the microphone
Passion for the Southern Highlands
Cheeky smile
Inquisitive personality
Need to
Answer questions
And get to the bottom of things

Graeme will not let any
Issue or subject shut him up
After doing his research

Boots and all
Like a pit bull dog
He jumps in
And doesn’t let go
Until the truth comes out

People have suggested that 
Graeme run for council
But Graeme feels
He can do more good
Behind the microphone
Keeping the councillors
On the straight and narrow

Graeme Day is the voice
The voice of the Southern Highlands
The voice of Justice 
The voice of reason 
The voice that soothes the Southern Highlands

(c)2013 Gordon Andrews

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013

Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Trust a Stranger

You're walking out the front entrance 
Leaving work behind you 
Forgetting the hustle of the day 
Looking forward to a quite drink 

Chilling out 
In your 
Soft 
Comfy 
Favourite 
Chair 

Staring into an open fire 
Being carried away with the beat of the music 
When all of a sudden 
You're startled 

By the thundering crackling 
Sound from the exhaust 
Of a oversized shinny motor bike 

A leather cladded rider dismounts
Blocking your path 
As you stand stunned & glued to the spot 
The rider comes up to your face 
Through a tinted visor on a black helmet 
You hear a soft gentle familiar voice saying

Put this on and let's go 
All your fears flash in front of you 
But your censors say your safe 
You allow this gentle giant 
To carefully place the open face helmet over your head 
Slowly secure it under your chin 
Hands you some wrap around sun glasses
Without a word 

The rider shows you how to 
Comfortably mount a bike 
Indicates you to wait until he is on 
Gives you the nod
As you mount the bike 

Cuddle into the rider 
looking over his right shoulder 
Smelling & feeling the leather on your bare skin 
As you clasp your hands together 
Around the stomach of the rider 

The bike starts 
Startled by the noise you jump 
And thrusted back as we take off 

Slowly through the main street 
Slow down even more for the school zone 
Swerving 
Swaying 
Dodging 
In and out 
Of the afternoon traffic 

Leaving the bottle neck behind 
With the confusion and worry 
Hitting the open road 
Winding the throttle wide open 

The purring of the pipes 
Echoing off on coming cars 
The thumping of the motor 
Rising up through the seat 

The wind caressing your face 
As we brake hard and throw 
The bike down into a left hand lean 
Around the corner in one motion 
Pick the bike up and throw down 
Into a right hand corner 

Dancing 
Up 
Down 
And around 

Up the hill onto the flat 
Surrounded trees 
The afternoon sun strobing through the trees 

Behind the trees 
In the paddocks 
Prancing 
Dancing 
Meres and foals

Back into town 
Where I stop at your place 
I dismount 
Extend my hand to help you off 
Lovingly remove your helmet 
Tie it on the sissy bar 
Jump on the bike 

With a crack from the pipes 
The engine roars 
Burning the tar with my back tyre 
Leaving you standing in the cutter

Dumbfounded 
Bewildered 
Tingling 
Laughing and smiling

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013

Details | Gordon Andrews Poem

Prime Minister and Party Policy

All payments to past Prime Ministers shall stop
 
The Prime Minister, all Ministers, Politicians, Political Aids or Backbenchers whilst in their representative positions shall conduct themselves like Australian Ambassadors twenty four hours a day, seven days a week
 
The Prime Minister, all Ministers, Politicians, Political Aids or Backbenchers who are found guilty by a Judge  of breaking the law, or found to be lying whilst acting like Australian Ambassadors shall resign     
 
No Ministers, Politicians, Political Aids or backbenchers shall receive an income for a position they are no longer employed in   
 
The Prime Minister, all Ministers, Politicians, Political Aids or Backbenches shall be taxed in accordance to MMTPM-003-Financial Policy
 
The Prime Minister, all Ministers, Politicians, Political Aids or Backbenches shall not be entitled to claim Luxury or Fringe Benefit Tax against the position they hold
 
Any political party that indicates it is an Australian party shall consist of first generation Australians or over
 
Any person nominated to be Prime Minister has to be at least second generation Australian or over
 
One vote for one person, no coalition or preferences are allowed to gain votes.  No vote is transferable
 
One vote for Give Aussies A Go Party means that vote can only be used by Give Aussies A Go Party. In other words, first past the post wins
 
Electoral division may only be changed by vote. Voters must live in that division. Simple investment in that division is not sufficient qualification to vote.
 
Political members or any representative of any electoral division must be a resident in that division for minimum of ten years

Copyright © Gordon Andrews | Year Posted 2013

12

Book: Shattered Sighs