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Jacob Cra Poem
I didn’t do my math homework!
I watched T.V instead!
I better come up with an excuse... and quick!
Or else I’m surely dead!
My brother tore it!
It’s in the garbage!
Mom says it causes brain damage!
My power was out!
I had the flu!
I was having trouble excreting my poo!
You know, why even bother?
My excuses are so lame!
I know! My dog ate my homework!
Now to find a dog I can blame...
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2012
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Jacob Cra Poem
I just can't stand poetry!
It badly boggles my brain!
I'm supposed to learn to rhyme!
But uck! You think I'm not sane?
I just can't stand poetry!
With its assonance and stuff!
"These three fleas fly in the breeze,"
I have really had enough!
I just can't stand poetry!
With metaphors I am through!
I'm becoming quite outraged!
A beast I'm turning into!
I just can't stand poetry!
Using similes? The worst!
I think we both can agree,
it's like being in jail! But worse!
I just can't stand poetry!
Personification's dumb!
I think my head will explode!
BOOM! Oww... that wasn't so fun!
I just can't stand poetry!
But I HAVE TO preach it... Grr!
I wish I had not applied
To be an English teacher!
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2013
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Jacob Cra Poem
Now I know the burden of pain.
The true malevolence of the world.
My eyes were blinded, my emotions deceived,
My dreams all a wild fantasy.
Once upon a time,
I was under the impression
That life was a joy, all fun and games.
An illusion of grandeur.
Now I know the destruction of war.
The killing machines it creates.
Dehumanized, robotized.
We were animals who could not think for themselves.
Now I know the reality of battle.
Sides separated by only the color of a uniform.
All hatred is lost, any hope is crushed.
Survival is the only motivation to move on.
I have witnessed the horrors of death.
Experienced the brutality of war.
Deprived of my youth and innocence.
Witnessed brothers die in front of my own two eyes.
Now I know.
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2015
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Jacob Cra Poem
Make it
Or Break it
That's High School for Ya'
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2013
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Jacob Cra Poem
I think my brother’s a werewolf!
It’s hard to believe but so true!
At dusk he is like a great beast!
He’s hairy and scary; bearded too!
He’s never around in the daytime.
He sneaks out with a creepy girl.
I have a feeling that someday,
she’ll eat his gross flesh... and then hurl!
I see red bumps on his forehead
that count the days ‘till a full moon.
I sure hope he’s not contagious!
Or I’ll be a werewolf quite soon!
Scratching his head doing homework!
Wetting his bed while he’s asleep!
These are just a few of the signs
proving that he’s a monstrous creep!
I went to my mother and told her
about my brother superbly.
Then she giggled and simply said,
“Dear, he’s going through puberty!”
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2012
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Jacob Cra Poem
Legendary star Mickey Mouse
Lives with his pals in a clubhouse!
Say he lost his journal filled with
doodles.
All he has to do is scream “Oh
Toodles!”
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2012
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Jacob Cra Poem
At five, I stole your teddy bear
Chopping the head off and cutting all its hair.
As teens, I posted a picture
Which made you become rather unpopular.
When grown, I crashed your brand new car
An accident which I made you pay all for.
Now old, I wish I could've been
There for you all those times like you were for me.
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2013
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Jacob Cra Poem
I ate a purple jelly bean
after my lunch one day!
But I accidently swallowed it whole
so my mom called the doc right away!
He told her I'd be fine,
just give it some time!
He also prescribed me some strange-looking
sour, acidic, Calamondin limes!
Apparently these limes
would make the pain go away.
But honestly all they did for me
was give me facial expressions that were crazy!
After the limes, I went to get a drink
to wash the taste out of my mouth.
Unfortunately, when I went to get a drink
I tripped on my kitten's pet mouse!
So far it had been a terrible day!
Horrid, I tell you! Horrid!
I don't want to know what'll happen next!
I think I'll just go to bed!
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2013
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Jacob Cra Poem
I am Flounder, wild and young.
I flap my fins and love to have fun.
And sometimes when I eat bad algae,
I make the water a little bit bubbly!
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2012
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Jacob Cra Poem
We used to have a lunch lady
who was so very mean.
She was also very ugly,
and she was never clean!
She was hairy as a monkey!
Revolting as a skunk!
And unlike typical ladies,
she really, really stunk!
So I talked to my principal
about her horridness.
He had her replaced soon enough
and oh, what a huge mess!
Her food was pretty disgusting
and so I didn’t strive
The horrid octopi she made
when mine was still alive!
It went and crawled out of my bowl;
but then bit off my head!
So that’s my excuse for staying
at home and not being in school instead.
Copyright © Jacob Cra | Year Posted 2012
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