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Sue Barnes Poem
Imagine if you will.
by Sue Ella DeVille on Thursday, January 5, 2012 at 3:07am
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Imagine if you will.... being young, beautiful, living life on top of the world. Imagine thinking the world is the best place to be. Imagine hearing the phone ring, its your best friend, your mother, her comforting voice that means everything will be ok. But its not. Imagine if you will hearing a trembling voice, one thats always happy but this time its not, its the voice of death calling. Susie, your oak tree is dying. Imagine now that your world has crashed, came to a stop, hurt and confusion set in. Momma, please dont go, I dont know my way, I need you. "baby, lean on your family, theres a whole forrest of trees". Imagine if you will, the long quiet drive, 6 hours of silence, just to hear people talking thru the curtians, whispers," Is that the children? what will happn to them? oh, theyre old enough to fend for themselves" but still, we are numb. Imagine if you will, a Priest rambling on, banging on inscents, walking around the box that holds her, we watch yet I have no memory, only of the numbness. Imagine now coming home, alone, just wanting to grab something of hers, just to smell her, feel her, touch her one more time, But theres nothing. an empty house. Its all gone. "You dont deserve anything! you are a bad child, I will decide who can have her things" Imagine now if you will, nothing, nothing to touch, nothing to feel, nothing to smell. everyone has gone, you're a kid, sitting on the step of an empty house. alone. no forrest, just an empty field (I wrote this July 8th, about 5 years ago on the 25th anniversary of her death, I sent it in a letter & then I destroyed the original, it was to painful to remember. She's in my head once again pushing me to write my trouble & my feelings, she does this to me when i need her most, she's still a good momma to me)
Copyright © Sue Barnes | Year Posted 2012
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Sue Barnes Poem
• I feel like I'm tangle'd in a net a few feet from the surface. The more I struggle to breathe, the more I fight to surface, the more tangle'd I become. I can see the light, I know its only a few feet away but my strength & my desire to fight is slowly fading away. I am So tired, so cold. Am I going to ever breathe again? am I ever going to feel the warmth of sunshine on my face again? or do I just close my eyes and let the waters take me? one last gulp will fill my lungs and the peace will overflow into my body. what will I do?,
My hand thrust'd upwards, I can feel the air. the breeze blowing between my fingers. my heart starts to beat again. i feel as if i can live, i become happy again, a glimpse of hope. what? what is that? OMG! its the devil herself, she has a death grip on my foot, she's pulling me downwards. all I can hear is her voice srceaming, she wants my air, she wants my life. She is evil & conniving, she lets me think that I might make it, that i might live, that I have a chance. she lets me see my hearts true desire before she pulls me down for the last time. she is reading this now, she sits & giggles, proud of herself for her accomplishments. The jokes on her though, I have nothing left to lose, my life is gone, I'm at peace. but she's still in hell
Copyright © Sue Barnes | Year Posted 2012
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Details |
Sue Barnes Poem
I'm sitting here hearing the noises the voices in my head. they ramble on of a better place and oh the warmth of the red thats flowing down into a puddle beside me on the floor, if I had the strength I'd scream for help thats just beyond the door, my demons are screaming with great delight at what they've accomplished today, the devil is coming to drag me to hell, to take my soul away. i feel the evil gripping my soul i cant seem to gasp for a breath, my soul is fading my sights going dim it seems ive met my uncertian death. theres a woman screaming just hang on honey let me go get some one, the demons are shrieking and laughing at me , the damage has already been done. the devil herself is standng by me telling me to close my eyes and sleep, it'll all be over in just a short while and no more will i hear a peep, from the voices that haunt me and scream all hours but the devil is such a liar, she's just dragging me down to toss me in that horrible enternal fire. i hear my demons screaming again dancing around in my head, they are celebrating their joyous occasion because they think im dead. im not dead though, im still alive although thats not what Gina was hoping, because she's the devil, the one with the steel, that cut my arms wide open.
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Copyright © Sue Barnes | Year Posted 2012
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