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Cynthia Cellars Poem
Just say GO
An imaginary race,
Running nowhere fast,
Sweat pours down my face,
Hoping time has passed.
Pop a pill an hour,
Distractions proving gold,
Hop into a shower,
Warm away the cold.
Drink. Drink. Drink.
Substitute the full.
Sink. Sink. Sink.
Deeper in the hole.
Hold on tight,
The pain will cease,
Then again,
It might increase.
Watch the mirror,
Let me know,
Tell me truthfully
Friend or foe?
Touch me, Love me, Praise me,
If only you knew how,
The aching doesn’t phase me,
I feel what I allow.
Run, fall, stop,
Sweat, sorrow, hurt,
Water, faster, pop,
Strong will, assert.
Temptation everywhere,
Peel away my skin,
Please don’t ever stare,
At what’s left within.
Gorge, eat, fill,
Shower, cry, sleep,
All against my will,
Guilty secrets keep.
Awake again tomorrow,
Vow a better day,
Full of shame and sorrow,
Starting over is ok….
Run harder, sweat more,
Pill, water, hands shake,
A casualty of food and war,
Legs, arms, stomach, ache.
Exhaustion engulfs,
Weakness follows,
Fade into sleep,
Darkness swallows.
Make it stop,
Pill, run, sweat, eat,
Spin my top,
Lose, gain, win, defeat.
Drop down,
Shake, cry,
Breathe slow,
Smile, die.
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Copyright © Cynthia Cellars | Year Posted 2012
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Details |
Cynthia Cellars Poem
Every now and then,
A memory will surface,
Emerging from within,
Secretive in purpose.
Revealing bits of life,
I didn’t know exist,
Ashamed of what I’ve done,
Things I should resist.
They happened in a state,
That surely wasn’t me,
Inhibitions undiscovered,
Exploration; casually.
Liquor of deception,
Relaxing from inside,
Conspiracy of cells,
Contempt of what they hide.
So far away,
All the recollections,
Maybe yesterday,
Created these perceptions.
Save me from myself,
Both of me collide,
Wading in the ocean,
Brought back with evening tide.
Putting together days,
Making sense of nights,
Disgusted with results,
Of unrelenting heights.
Flashes of men,
Getting what they want,
Obliging to the fullest,
All the while I haunt,
A body that I share,
With a decent girl,
I am the oyster,
She is the pearl.
I know she knows,
That I exist,
Who else would have,
Slit our wrist.
Arriving with the whiskey,
Taking it from there,
Undo her blouse,
Let down her hair,
Let go of dreams,
Rules and restrictions,
Misrepresent,
Her derelictions,
And when I am tired,
I allow her return,
Hiding the truth,
That she wants to learn.
Copyright © Cynthia Cellars | Year Posted 2012
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Details |
Cynthia Cellars Poem
Inside my body,
I have to stay
And live this life,
As day repeats day.
Like a cage
I’m barred in tight
And struggle so hard,
My knuckles turn white
The walls stand high
The bars hold firm
Sentenced to life
No bail, nor term
Pressure climbs up
Time slowly slips
My mind is not growing
Just my thighs and my hips
Their demands are too great,
Impossible to master,
If I’m full grown,
Result of disaster
Just inches above water,
Struggling to survive
Drowning in sadness
I fight to stay alive
No more weight,
I refuse to adapt,
Living in my mind
But ultimately trapped
I will keep screaming
Until something is done
I’ll attack my problems
And not try to run
I’ll dry bitter tears,
With all the world’s salt
By finally acknowledging,
My problems are my fault.
I was the one,
Who opened the door,
Letting rivers run
And starting this war
Every time I cried,
The water grew stronger,
So did the tide,
Till I could breathe no longer
Therefore, only I
Can swim through the mess
And take a chance to die
With a blindfolded guess
As to where or what
The heavy plug may be
And relieve it from its job
Of slowly killing me.
Copyright © Cynthia Cellars | Year Posted 2012
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