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Francine Jaramillo Poem
You once wrote a letter to me, do you remember?
You brought it over to me that first morning in November.
You came to me all bush-eyed and hungover,
Wanting to know if I would be your four leaf clover.
I sat you down and held you while you cried,
I told you I would be there till I died.
I should have known it from the start,
I'd hold you at bay and let it all fall apart.
We can't count the sequence of events that lead to our demise,
Or how we let the truths we spoke in those moments all become lies.
Sometimes I still sit and contemplate how I could've changed things,
But I always come to the conclusion it's not probable we're both complicated beings.
God had only alloted a little bit of time for us till we met our end,
But I would have been spoiled to get more than that with my first best friend
Copyright © Francine Jaramillo | Year Posted 2010
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Francine Jaramillo Poem
All my inspiration
Comes from my lack of medication
If not for my ball of nerves
I would never have any words
To put down as a rhythmic flow
And enable me to keep my mind in tow
I can’t say for sure
But writing has become my cure
It’s the essence that boils my blood
And keeps me fighting in the world’s mud
But when the hostilities cease
Will I still be able to keep my lease
That being the little talent
Becoming very gallant
In my hand
To the growing book on my nightstand?
Copyright © Francine Jaramillo | Year Posted 2010
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Francine Jaramillo Poem
god im struggling, god im suffocating
god im shattering, god im unraveling
god don't let it stop......god, its better this way.
My chest is heavy
but its not from the oxygen.
How can my lungs inflate
when I can barely breathe?
Im gasping and yet my lungs don't feel the burn.
How can they when my heart is the one inflamed?
So full of a reserved unrational emotion?
My heart its putting up towers
its making defenses no one can penetrate.
Years will pass and still not even an atomic bomb will make a dent.
I think my heart is hardening.
god im angry, god im unsatisfied
god im putting up a facade,
god please dont let it be.
My head has ample amounts of animosity,
but my heart won't stand for it.
It sends out compassion to flood those volitile cogitations away,
like adrenaline in a altercation.
My head swells with the sudden urge to run amiss
making tours of every memory sufficient enough to spurn that acrimony.
god im overwhelmed, god im so bested
god its for the best, god I understand
god...better me.
To stand above a comrade in a war you've waged against them is not winning
if anything its defeat and betrayal to oneself.
To strike out backwards on our past taking the rough terrain
and easy walking is vigorous but well worth it.
My sanity is forever indebted for had I not seen the alternate
paths and how destructive they'd have been to you,
I would still be standing here in my beligerance.
Whats left of my heart after it was mauled would corode away just like our friendship.
Better me, I don't think I could live with myself lavishly
had the alternative come about.
Better me, I'd rather be the one to burn.
Copyright © Francine Jaramillo | Year Posted 2010
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Francine Jaramillo Poem
take it all back to the silent wonders of god's thoughts
take it all back to bold decisions addressed by smaller beings
take it all back to simple love with violent repercussions
throw away all tones and manners with crude beginnings
throw away all animosity towards future posterity
throw away all symptoms of your second nature
flee from every urge to run with yesterdays self
flee from the shady demons lurking in all the crevices of your mind
flee from the ruin of the outlook of past days
find faith in all minuscule successes
find a puff of air with relief held in its make up
find your core and make sure its still got a pulse
Copyright © Francine Jaramillo | Year Posted 2010
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Francine Jaramillo Poem
I've given you immaculate slates
With every blink of my eyes,
Only to watch you tarnish them with all my inequities.
I've tried to push you away
With more force then every exhale.
I've drained myself to continue the symptoms
Never to be offered a transfusion.
I've prayed for solace
Only to be asked for more reparations.
I've burned every vein
Trying to convey my love for you.
I've watched in disbelief
As you showed me the fate of our world.
I've screamed for you
While you made me your exile.
I've seen you in me
With more certainty than our bodies on this earth.
I've learned to hate myself
By your example.
I've given you up
To gain faith in the potential.
I've broken all your immaculate slates
With a pump of my heart.
Copyright © Francine Jaramillo | Year Posted 2010
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Francine Jaramillo Poem
It's all closing in
It's all there
Yet there is nothing
Sleep is anxiety
Wakefulness is struggle
There is a surplus of fear and destitute
There is a famine of ecstasy and even contentment
I am residing in a foreign land
I've never been here
Yet its been inside me since the air touched my lungs
I am not changing
I am only discovering
What is it though
I understand
But don't see
It is new
It is old
It is my mind
It is developing
It has found a sense
That sense is a trigger
It is a warning
Copyright © Francine Jaramillo | Year Posted 2010
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