Details |
Nova Waller Poem
It’s my therapy
Yet they never happen
It’s looking out and seeing nothing
Listening to music without a care
Crying and venting to emptiness
Being stuck in time while everything else races around
Trying to explain your silence
While being told to shut up
Because you “talk too much”
Late Night Drives are my escape
The escape from the constant battle in my head
Telling me that I’m not good enough
Saying I’ll never be pretty no matter how much makeup
Yelling at me to finally commit to the bit and end it
Late Night Drives
They help me clear my mind
But when they don’t happen
It races a thousand miles a minute
Listening to music without a care
Looking out and seeing nothing
Nothing but a trainwreck of words and emotions
Scared they will judge you
Judge you because of the music you play to cope
This fear would disappear
If Late Night Drives
Could make their way
Into this depression-filled life
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2024
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
The Only Thing I was to him was a temporary toy
I was never a real person
One that had feelings and a heart
Just a toy that he can play with and break
Just to put it back together and do it again
To him, I was just something to use till satisfaction was met
That is all I have ever been to anybody
Just something to be used
The haunting words of them saying
“I love you”
And them not meaning it burns
It is cut into your skin
Over and over again
Leaving scars every time they say it and don’t mean it
They mess with your emotions
Till they realize you are committed
Then they pick you up and drop you
So they can see you be broken
They proceed to try and put you back together again
But there is such a thing called a breaking point
And I fear I have hit it
Rock Bottom
Some do not think it's possible to get there just by one
But there have been many
Many heartbreaks
Just to be picked up by the same
Picked up by the one who hurt you
The one who pushed you past your breaking point
To see you crumble
So they can pick you up again
This behavior
They think it's okay
But they refuse to open their eyes
To see the real damage that they are doing
They refuse to believe that this is true
That they did this to you
But it is
It is all true
And they are the ones who truly broke you
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2024
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
Be the one
The one that opens my eyes
I’m tired of always putting up a fight
A wave of thoughts come barreling in at night
Please just wipe my mind
Give me a meaning to this life
Take away this knife
The one that’s plunged into my core
I can’t stand it anymore
Take my pain
Make it yours
Tell me how it makes you feel
It’s surreal, isn’t it
Everything I feel is real
Be the one
The one that gives me life
Please, don’t let this be a lie
I’m tired of seeming alright
There is no light
I’ve lost all my might
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2024
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
Love, A feeling I thought I was capable of keeping
Yet when I get it, It fades.
I put on a masquerade
Hoping things would change
Everything I say a facade
I've lost the meaning of love
I thought I found the one, The other half of me
But I get pushed to the back
Set up on a rack
Just to be looked at
Never a prize, Always a possession
Maybe this is just an obsession
To the feeling, I can never get right
I put up a fight
It’s always the worst at night.
I blame my mind, The dark space where I go
When I’m feeling all alone
I’ve tried to forget the smell of his cologne
It’s engraved in my mind
The look in his eyes
I try to improvise
This mask that I wear, I’ll never see clear
Through this obsession
Did I forget to mention
That love for me is no progression
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2024
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
This love-sick feeling
The one I can’t shake
It makes my heart ache
I thought things would change
But they always seem to stay the same
Everything so delayed
God, can I catch a break
This pain I feel inside
I know I can’t hide
From this love-sick feeling inside
Like a punch to the gut
There’s no amount of preparation for that
“Baby, I don’t feel so good”
Those words you never understood
All I want to do is make you feel okay
Yet I get pushed away
Is this a never-ending game
Same person different face
I guess this is my fate
Same face different day
In this bed, I lay
This love-sick feeling
The one I can’t shake
Things for me will never change
I’m afraid
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2024
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
Tired of the pain I’m feeling everyday
Tired of playing in this never-ending game
I need someone to take it away
Make me feel okay
I don’t want to lose this fight
I’ve used all my might
Yet it comes around again to play
It’s always when I’m in a happy place
In a constant race
Angles and demons fighting in my brain
I try to get the demons to go away
But they have sunk in their claws
They’ve grown comfortable in my mind
I guess this is where they chose to lay
In my tired mind, where things never seem to leave
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2025
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
There’s always this feeling
Way in the bottom of my heart
Of maybe I am just the unlovable one
The feeling that makes me feel sick when we kiss
That makes your touch feel like fire
Saying “I love you”
Leaving a sour taste on my tongue
I hate the feeling of being unlovable
Yes, I may be able to find someone who loves me
But it’s always
Never enough
Or too much
I can’t find that happy medium
Maybe I am too complicated to love
Maybe I’m the problem
What if it’s not other people
But me, as a collective
The one who likes to push and pull
The one who bends and breaks
The one who caves in the end
The unlovable girl
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2025
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
Distruction
Depression
Drugs
Death
Just a part of how I used to feel
I thought I would never heal
Never see through this cloud of fog
But I have found God
The one true love that I need
If I didn’t have him, I don’t know where I would be
He helps me see clearly
My dear heavenly Father
Oh, how loving you have been
Showing me the good
Never leading me astray
Healing me through you, never walking away
Your earthbound child
Here to love thy neighbor
Share your love and peace
You have taught me to fight my battles through you
And that is what I shall keep continuing to do
My saving grace
Though I may not be able to see your face
I will continue to chase
The short chase for your love
Heavenly Father, take me in
Oh, wait, you already did
That’s why I’ve had this relief
This weight has been lifted
Thoughts have shifted
I never believed in you when I was a kid
I hid away from your love
But as I’ve gotten older, we’ve only grown closer.
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2025
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
Every time the seasons change
My love seems to grow astray
But I’m hoping with you, that can change
For you make me see the color
Through your rose-shaded glasses
You turned mine from grey
I wish I could say
The things I would like
But I’ll save it for another day
For I don’t think you can bear what I have to say
This forever drift from you
I don’t see this working through
The lies
The cries
The drift that never ends
Every day, I know that you try
But efforts aren’t enough anymore
Help me get back to the shore
I’m about to die
Drowning in the drift
The one you caused with your consistent games
The Forever Drift
Let me drift with you
If he can’t be the one to save me
Then take me away with this memory
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2025
|
Details |
Nova Waller Poem
This never-ending loop
Everything that I do comes back around
I try my hardest, but my efforts aren’t enough
It’s my mind or body
There is no in between
In this never-ending loop
Free me from this prison, I can call love
I don’t think it’s for me
My mind constantly in scrambles
Trying to make you feel okay
It’s either maturity or childishness
I can’t date a child
Body or mind
No in between
But he’s my soul
My life
The glue that is holding this show together
The only problem is, I can't say what’s on my mind
Without him crying
The poor pitiful boy
Who can’t stand the truth
Copyright © Nova Waller | Year Posted 2025
|