Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
I don’t know.
So I don’t starve.
So that I can subscribe to the 40 hour work week.
So I can have my life in the hands of capitalist kings.
Who have their lives in the hands of market gods.
So that I can join the many that have good work ethic
Which basically means being in a state of gratefulness for this tiring job
This life sapping job.
You should hire me because I’ll be a good, not passionate worker.
I’m just passionate about being financially stable.
So I can have my life in seconds, enjoy it in stolen minutes.
So in those seconds I can say
Hey. I’m a working gal.
I think all this. I know all this.
My mouth opens
“I think it’ll be a great opportunity to work with your prestigious organization. I am ready to give the very best of myself to align and uplift the mission of this place”
I’m ready to give my soul away.
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|
Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
I’ve always thought dancing with a stranger in the rain seemed too far fetched
With my mind?
It sounds like a kidnapping
Or a ploy to sell my organs
Even a scheme to violate me
Because in reality I have to always be afraid
I have to always be watchful
I have to be equipped with the body of Wonder Woman and the mind of Charles Xavier
Because I’m a woman I have to be triple of a man to be equal to a man.
I can’t be laid back because it’ll be a shame.
I can’t dilly dally as I like because I’ll be “untamable”.
I can’t own a fluent sexuality without being a whore.
Like I wasn’t also with men who were such.
I have to be defensive enough to not be called angry.
And not too agreeable so when the evil occurs they don’t say I didn’t do enough.
Not that the abuser abused. But that the victim allowed for the victimization.
That I probably wanted it.
I probably caused it.
People only want to see the extremes of my cause.
The insignificant pieces of the whole.
They want to have but not to hold.
To control. To use. To fold.
Isn’t it women after all?
So the only stranger I want to dance with is peace.
I want to frolic in the rain with equity.
Where I know I can truly dance.
I can truly breathe.
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|
Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
Without the preamble of you
Or the story of we
This is the reality after the show
The stage after the cast calls
The lines within the gory scenes
The truth after defenses
This is it
This is it?
This vast place of insufficiency
This palace built on inconsistency
Empty talk and woozy promises
Desperate lies and hungry wishes
This pain in the truth
The truth that I too let this charade stand
I said march on to the band
So brethren this is it.
Join me to loathe it
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|
Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
Sometimes I smell things
Things that take me back. And remind me of a certain place, a certain time
Smells are important to me
The smell from my dad coming home from work.
The smell of fried rice on mornings of my birthday.
The sweet vanilla smell from my mom every time she’s close.
The sterile smell of buildings where we escape to.
The smell of puff puff bought with illegal church offering.
The smell of dried cane when the punishment comes.
More than anything, I like the fragrance of souls.
The aroma of you.
I want you.
I want the scent of your soul
Oakwood wisps with husky undertones
To mix with mine.
Lavender sighs and rose whispers.
And become mine.
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|
Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
I can’t put myself out there
Emotionally, you know
The heart is really the most fragile thing
Like a fine china cup
Outside, where it’s cold and windy
And hateful and unwholesome
Spiteful and too bright
I don’t want to be chipped more than I’ve healed
I’m in this cupboard
Safe.
So my heart is Anxious. Anticipating. Angry that no one has come
Calm. Controlled. Cinched in place
I’ve succeeded in keeping hell out
But now heaven can’t come in
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|
Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
In the learning of the world and it’s pain, it’s rules and it’s sadness
I’ve unlearnt myself
And that is the true tragedy.
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|
Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
Today someone told me that I was strong because I wasn’t close to you.
I’m flabbergasted
I don’t understand
Did they want me to cry on the streets?
To throw all inhibition.
To run? To hide?
To stop living?
To stop existing?
I’m only strong because I have littler ones behind me
I’m only strong because there’s a grace that surrounds me
I’m only strong because it’s still unreal. Still too much to think about.
I’m only strong because nobody hears me cry at night. Nobody listens in on the conversations in my head. Nobody knows the visions, like a broken record, playing over and over and over while I try to sleep.
I’m only strong because I choose to fight myself in empty halls and dusty buildings.
I’m only strong because now I have to live a life; fulfill a dream that I once was too tired to carry on with.
It hurts. That’s there’s too much to say and no way to say it. That I feel, intensely and completely, but there’s no way to relieve it. To interpret it. To run away from it.
I’ll still be strong. In the ways that I know how to.
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|
Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
My heart skipped two beats
I thought I saw you at that corner
And now I’m crippled by the fact that
You don’t have to be in the room
To cast your spell on me
I’ve always put reason before feeling
Thought over Passion
My mind is in control of my body
But you’re the one on my mind +
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|
Details |
Divine Izeg Poem
I like to complain about being locked in
I like to nag about my freedom
About how much I have lost the illusion of control over things. Over me.
I was scared. I was afraid that being alone with me would be devastating.
There would be no escape from my mind.
There would be no relieve from the stress.
But here I am, locked in but still escaping, still avoiding
Still on the brink of confronting the dark
Still hesitating, still contemplating
Still having dreamless nights
Still not knowing the hows and whys
Still not choosing the correct whens
In a sense, I’ve always been shut out from the world.
I’ve always had to filter their promises so that my eyes don’t sting and my chest doesn’t tighten in despair.
I’ve always kept my space from people; keeping hell out but not letting heaven in
I’ve always avoided spreading me, the true message of me
Because I was afraid that leaving me would be too easy, and between them contagious.
So when I say I can’t wait to get out, I mean it.
I can’t wait to get out from this
And breathe easy. And move forward
Copyright © Divine Izeg | Year Posted 2020
|