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Ramona Harden Poem
I will never love again he said how that phrase tormented my own head. Not knowing him but just a few months I hesitate if I dare to confront. I’m at war with myself do I tell him my thoughts or should I hide them inside so they don’t get caught. You see I’ve been walking a line that’s so fine. Ive fallen for a man whose heart maybe blind. I ponder is it possible that I can pretend to not care living a lie while I’m breathing his air. I tell myself put the pen down you will ruin things just wait but I don’t listen to that voice I seal my fate. Now why are you doing this to yourself everything’s fine don’t go and ruin things all of the time. But my heart is so full of words unspoken knowing that doing this it will be broken I still write. Line after line all of my feelings telling him how his smile is appealing His sheets are wet with my tears he will never know how much I hold him dear. Pages and pages of nothing but words that I feel I gave him a way out in my letter what the heck am I thinking how is this better. Would it not be less painful sticking around seeing if perhaps his heart can be found. Oh how I wish I were smarter then this. Now I just sit in my own black abyss. I folded my note and put it where it would be found and walked out the door with not much of a sound. He was shoveling the snow off his driveway and I’m thinking please please see things my way. I stole a quick kiss and said goodbye not knowing if that would be it forever and personally my own heart I severed. I backed out slowly and stopped just for that last smile on his face and nothing will ever ever take it’s place. Yes I unfortunately fell in love with this man I’m not even for sure if he would understand. Now I sit and I wait for a text that says it’s ok your crazy at times will take things day by day. Instead there’s just silence that was the the other choice that I gave. I’ve texted him afterwards Telling him I don’t want him to leave but all I can now do is just grieve. I cry for the lost I created with mearly a note and my own heart that I broke. I can say I’m sorry please forgive me I’ll walk that fine line if you need pretending to not care about you but my heart will know that’s certainly not true. So I sit and I wait and what do you think I hear nothing but the silence that I feared.
Copyright © Ramona Harden | Year Posted 2019
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Ramona Harden Poem
My mind deceives me it makes me dream. My dreams deceive me they make me long for things unreal. My body deceives me it Surrounds my heart that loves. My love deceives me it makes my eyes weep. My eyes deceive me by showing me the truth. My truth deceives me because it’s full of lies. My lies deceive me because I believe in them. I believe them because they are forever in my mind. My mind deceives me because I’m left dreaming again.
Copyright © Ramona Harden | Year Posted 2019
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Ramona Harden Poem
Why do I let myself want things I cannot have. Dream things that will never be. Will I always hurt for eternity? I want a love that will last forever yet I'm stuck in this life of displeasure. So I walk in the shadows of my desires wanting my heart to be filled with fires instead it grows cold from the darkness loneliness brings.And how I need more then that one night fling. My soul only fills with more sadness as I reach out to touch your face. How you must look at me with such disgrace but the light I see in your eyes and the smile you always have it calls to me and unfortunately I carry my heart on my sleeves. So dear lover I know we may not share the same dreams but this I do plea please be kind to me when you leave. Because I'm nearly a woman who's words on paper are spoken and yes my heart can be very much broken.
Copyright © Ramona Harden | Year Posted 2019
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Ramona Harden Poem
As I sit here surrounded by his voice all I want is silence. I beg of him to just quit talking and let me be. However piece doesn't come so easily. My voice screams out in the dark only heard by my subconscious therefore he never hears my words. I remain silent as he shatters my heart into pieces. Wondering why this torture never ceases. I'm nothing now but a broken soul left withered on the floor. Praying that one day someone will open my doors. Unfortunately my doors are surrounded by walls that I've built. Mostly from the words he has spilt. Yet I'm afraid to let someone in and I'm afraid to be alone. I fear that I will never find where I belong. So I will remain hidden behind walls so high. Walking through life as I barely survive
Copyright © Ramona Harden | Year Posted 2019
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