I searched upstairs and downstairs, mask of fright,
repositioned machinery, turned on lights,
called my doctor and the operator,
tried passion and dispassion, meditation
and my morning crap, sang out of tune,
passed a school bus on the double yellow line.
A clock, a calendar, a ruler,
a minute and an inch. The kind of day
I never have, opens with orisons,
ends with an amen, ardor offsets humor.
I cannot locate the source of the hum
atoms alternating charges, e, i,
sharing and unsharing electrons, p.
I reck I hear (OMG!) my god.
RNA or DNA polymerase, an enzyme, protein, attracted to
promoter molecules in the polypeptide chain causing a zipper
motion and transcription of the code, a duplication of codons,
introns and exons, and so it goes, sharing and unsharing electrons.
These attractions and repulsions, coming near and going far
in nanounits or light years, fail to explain things permanently
but make possible the technology to live long and well, with personality.
It is a form of governance, the governance of elements, elements are now
apparently our gods. Learn all you can about their laws, their names,
their needs, read their poems. Only the mentally unusually sound would,
given this knowledge, agree to the process of fertilization and mitosis.
However,
organisms go round then senseless via involuntary respiration. Therefore,
Pilot Oh Pilot Me.
He has to get out if she becomes ill
What's his is his, what's hers his
His assets, unsharing
They say I will be good here
in this HOME. this place.this building
of shame
They smile and joke with or around me
in this unsafe haven. this dwelling. this menage
of "who to blame"
They get too crazy and obscene altogether
in this lame abode. this domicile. this unruly residence
of complete sadness
They are too comfortable and lazy
in this obsolete lodging. this room and that room.
this habitation
of unnecessary badness
They eat so aimlessly so unsharing in this faulty hovel.
this haunting hole. this soul binding burrow
of my harbored pain
They are not concerned much in this open accomodation.
this sickness of a roof over my head. this torturing casa
of constant restrain
They..as in my fellow people who
say they are my "friend"
in this HOME..my sleeping chambers
to be HERE..is as if i'm
waiting for my dismal end..
I must depart and leave this HOME
this unreal shell of ones
push to condescend
I must Break away from
this HOME..this casting of hate
I must...
I must...before its too late.
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