They rise
like unseen constellations
aligning themselves in silence—
each one tied to a choice
I have not yet made.
What comes for me
moves with intention.
What stays
does so because it is meant to root.
What leaves
makes space for a greater unfolding.
I feel myself opening to it—
slowly, bravely,
the way a soul unclenches
after years of holding its own weight.
Through life’s clenched jaw,
we struggle to survive.
We see our loved ones stumble;
expectations crumble.
Anxiety keeps grinding
and grinding
us down.
Money’s tight;
life’s jaw clenches tighter.
Health declines.
The jaws of death loom nearer.
Panic-stricken people
flee the only homes they’ve ever known -
refugees escaping war
or the clench and the stench
of oppression.
Through it all,
many make it through,
but oh the woe of those
living in the unrelenting grasp
of poverty
or of being chewed to bits
by abuse and fear.
Who gets to glide through a life
where slackened
is the jaw of life?
And who decides
if a clenched jaw will constantly
be others’ plight?
Only God alone can know;
it’s not ours to reason why.
Family and friends, good attitude,
hopefully faith and prayer
will help to make life’s clenched jaw
easier to pass through.
I firmly believe that in the end,
death’s relief for many
will be a welcomed friend.
When life’s jaw unclenches,
we can be released.
Then will understanding
flood our minds
and the light of God’s pure love
be new life’s sweet caress.
I continue staring at the wall.
If spiders started spilling out of that crack.
I don’t think I’d move.
My mom thinks I’m weird.
I hadn’t spoken for hours but there’s still echoes down here.
I could hear her.
Coming down to the basement,
Step, step, step.
I could snap out of it, snap out of it right now…
But I wait another beat.
Until she is two steps away,
So that she hears me gasp and my jaw unclenches.
Raspy, guilty, irritable.
I don’t want her to think something is wrong.
So I go upstairs with her, and pretend.
And leave my magical portal behind.
She sighs,
clenches her fists,
and dies...
Again and again,
an incessant drumming
that pounds at almost midnight
uncaring, so loud, too loud
like those awful karaoke singers
who think they can sing,
but of course can't
small parts of her die each time
she takes the time to think
she unclenches her fists
in silence
errrr strings burst from sirens
lights strobe in our ears blinding us
i can hardly listen to speaking mumbles
a heavy bass resonates between us
down another drink upside down
countdown to rundown
ooppps punched in face by fist in face
blood falls out of face that has been punched by fist
blood from face falls on floor fist removes from face
placed down by bodies side
unclenches
screaming idiots covered in plasma
laugh silently
punch angrily
die readily
night ends on sticky floors
fight ends before it began
light comes on
get out get out
strings burst sirens
(slowly silently)
lights strobe ears blinding
(talk talk talk)
hardly listen speaking mumbles
(shout quicker)
heavy bass resonates between
(envelop everyone)
down drink upside down
(laugh joyous)
quite entertaining millions
(thousands mourn)
not funny own
(never funny alone)
punched face fist face
(pain abounds sorrow)
blood falls face punched fist
(scars form)
blood face falls floor fist removes face
(bruises rage)
placed down bodies side
(tired upset chaos)
unclenches
(relax)
night ends sticky floors
(motionless diseased)
fight ends before began
(audiences disperse)
light comes
(refresh renew)
out get out
(run fast free)
homeward bound headed
(sleep follows soon)
alone naturally
(again again again)
another night some say
(good bad unknown)
head not agree stomach morning
(never never ever)
neither contents
(infinity reversed)
errrr strings burst from sirens
lights strobe in our ears blinding us
i can hardly listen to speaking mumbles
a heavy bass resonates between us
down another drink upside down
yeah thats quite entertaining to millions
not so funny on your own
ooppps punched in face by fist in face
blood falls out of face that has been punched by fist
blood from face falls on floor fist removes from face
placed down by bodies side
unclenches
night ends on sticky floors
fight ends before it began
light comes on
get out get out
homeward bound i headed
alone again naturally
another great night some would say
my head will not agree with my stomach in the morning
neither will its contents
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