Come here you little Tinca
Come here towards my net
Come here you little Tinca
You're a new PB I bet.
Ive fed you worms and maggots
Caught Roach and Bream its true
But as nice as it is to catch them
I came here to try and catch you.
My rod is near bent double
The line it sings with stretch
You pull towards the Lillies
To snap me off I bet?
So come here you great big Tinca
Don't drag me in the Reeds
My heart it wont stop pounding
Your weight I'm sure exceeds
The target that I set for you
Visions flashing through my mind.
13 pound 7 ounce female specimen
Please pass it oh be so kind.
Come here you Massive Tinca
My rods begun to creak
My arms are oh so tired
They ache and feel so weak
Come here you enormous Tinca
My net is now not far
Oh damn where is my camera
Aarrgh I left it in the Car!
Come here you behemoth Monster!
I cant see you in this dark
The Net it slides beneath you!
Ohhh Damn its a flippin CARP!
Hehh Hehh
Written and composed by Mark Longson (c) 2018
Fishes From Heaven
I’m sorry to leave that dear husband of mine
But Ted will be fine with his rod, reel and line
His love for his fishing left me in the shade
I often said Ted should have wed a mermaid
When I get to heaven, I don’t want a harp
Just send me back as a bloody great carp
If that cannot be then my gift from above
I’ll send Ted a forty pound pike with my love
He’d have little use for a nympho or wench
But he wouldn't say no to a ten pound tench
A monster sized barbel? Should I grant that wish?
Or get him to battle a monster catfish
So I can rest easy, at peace where I’m laid
Or sat on a cloud where I might see Ted wade
Into the lake where he’ll slip his big net
Under my gift that’s his biggest fish yet
I just think it’s fair that somehow I thank
My husband for fishing...
So I could see Frank.
2 February 2019
Contest: If I had a secret life
Sponsor: Caren Krutsinger
Timothy Dimwit
Timothy Dimwit would not go to school
And all of his mates considered that cool
But Timothy Dimwit was never in school
And as a result he knew nothing at all
Timothy Dimwit couldn't spell bat
He couldn't spell dog and he couldn't spell cat
He couldn't spell cod and he couldn't spell sprat
He did once spell hat, he was quite proud of that
Timothy Dimwit could not kick a ball
Because he decided, there must be a tool
Or some kind of whistle through which he could call
To cause it to rise up and bounce off a wall
Timothy Dimwit thought chips grew on trees
That candyfloss simply blew in on a breeze
And honey he wouldn't have guessed came from bees
But meatballs, he thought, could give cows trembly knees
Timothy didn't know Francais was French
That there was a kind of a fish called a Tench
Or that in the park, there's a seat called a bench
And Americans all call a spanner a wrench
So, I hope that you don't think that I'm preaching at all
With good education, you're nobody's fool
But Timothy Dimwit did not go to school
And as a result, he knew nothing at all.
salmon leap... for life
shallow streams bid them welcome
otters... all well fed
elvers... millions
passing salmon parr... seabound
smoked eel... delicious
tench... the doctor fish
sought by the diseased... ailing
the river flows on
the great white shark swims
an ever hungry beauty
makes good poetry
the Nile perch... hungry
nigh ate Lake Victoria
greedy humans
European perch
freshwater tiger mimics
finned finesse... tasty
Tommy Ruffe
a freshwater Pope... fishy
no bad habits
whale sharks
fancy the small things in life
jellyfish can sting
a fishy tale...
sirens of the oceans
Davy Jones... shoppers
lines of bubbles pop
the lake breathes... no... tench feeding
anglers hearts... racing...
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